Betrayal and Love

It's poetry I wrote sometime last year, I wanted to test-post something so this is it.

Blankness in the air
Darkness in my head
His love and joy not wanted
And I think of you instead

The light of the sun
The dark of the rain
Images of you and her
Causing so much pain

Zoning from here
Nothing seems real
But how much I care
And how I do feel

And the hate for myself
Because I can't say
How I feel
Or why I care this way

I wish I could stop it
That the burning would cease
But all that it does
Is seem to increase

And this love is not right
She is my friend
So god-damn controlling
But still there in the end

Don't know what to do
I think it is best
If now I just die
And put my soul to rest

It would save me the trouble
The care and the love
You'd be so happy
And I'd go above

Yet I stay in this world
For the hope in your eyes
Praying you care
And that she lies