This is a 1 act play that explores a relationship from an audio perspective.
I was recently reading a copy of Filthy Shakespeare, by Pauline Kiernan. She holds a Doctorate from the University of Oxford. Her scholarship makes her a well know expert on Shakespeare and Renaissance Drama. Two things jumped out at me from reading the book.
First, that Shakespeare was a master of the double entendre and wrote not just words with double meanings but entire passages of suggestive material, that could be interpreted simultaneously at a surface and subsurface level. On the surface the words could be taken at proper face value but underneath they were often lewd, and ridded with sexual pun and innuendo. The human brain trying to process these two trains of thought, would connect the dual meaning perhaps a millisecond apart inducing the mild state of hysteria we experience as humor.
Second, the theater of the day did not have the elaborate sets and visual effects to which we are now conditioned to expect. To be sure some of the more affluent theatergoers were close enough to the stage to receive both visual and audio ques but many more were unable to see very much and indeed the cheapest “seats” were outside with no visibility of the stage what so ever. Still Shakespeare’s plays were often packed both inside and out.
Now if you put these together there is an undercurrent of sensuality in his works where the ear was a more important sensor for cognitive input than the eye. This led me to ponder the question... can erotica be created in a dark room when all you can input is the dialogue. I don’t presume to be the first to consider this possibility nor a writer with the literary skills to necessarily pull it off but I’ve never been shy at pushing my skills to the limit. So for the benefit of those who wish to "boldly go" this play is a test of your hearing skills, and sense of humor.
One Act Play
Scene 1: The Opportunity
Setting: It was a Thursday night in Las Vegas and the National Real Estate Association had just finished the last seminar of the evening. The participants streamed out of the conference hall dispersing in all directions. Jonas Taylor, a successful broker from Los Angeles, decided he needed a drink and went into the lobby bar. It was not crowded and he took a seat at a table and waited for some service. As he sat there another broker Marcie Logan, from Boston, took notice. She had seen his name tag at the seminar and wondered if he was the same Jonas Taylor who had given her a good referral several months earlier.
Marcie: Excuse me, are you the Jonas Taylor from Taylor Associates in Los Angles.
Jonas: I am, do I know you?
Marcie: I’m Marcie Logan from Drake Morgan in Boston.
Jonas: (Standing.) Won’t you have a seat Ms. Logan....the name sounds familiar. (Takes a seat)
Marcie: You sent us a referral on the Watkins family when they moved back East, and we were able to find exactly what they were looking for.
Jonas: Of course, Miles and Susan Watkins...and I presume you were the selling agent. I was delighted to hear everything worked out.
Marcie: And I want to thank you. The commission came at a very opportune time.
Jonas: Don’t they all.... (laughing.)
Marcie: Anyway I didn’t want to intrude.....(Waiter walks up)
Jonas: There is no intrusion, Ms. Logan....I was going to have a drink before turning in for the night....would you care to join me.
Marcie: Are you sure?
Jonas: What will you have?
Marcie: A sweet vodka collins.
Jonas....(to the bar waiter) ...For the lady, and I’ll have a scotch and water.
Marcie: What did you think of the seminar.
Jonas: I doubt that our guest speaker ever sold a piece of real estate in his life.
Marcie: You know, I kept thinking the same thing...all the while he was talking.
Jonas: So are you having a good time?
Marcie: It’s good to get away, but I miss my daughter.
Jonas: I’m sure your husband can manage.
Marcie: Not my husband, my mother.
Jonas: Did I put my foot in my mouth?
Marcie: Don’t worry, its fine. We’ve been divorced for over a year.
Jonas: I should know better than make such a bone headed assumption.
Marcie: So are you ready to head back to LA tomorrow?
Jonas: Lord yes....I'm so behind and all this week its been one distraction after another.
Marcie: Well I’m sure your wife will be glad to see you....opppps!
Jonas: Opppps is right!...welcome to the club.
Marcie: You’re not married.
Jonas: Not any longer.
Jonas: I wish I was....
Marcie: What am I missing?
Jonas: My wife passed away last year....
Marcie: I’m so sorry.
Jonas: So am I.... (The drinks arrive, there is an awkward silence that ensues. They drink their drinks).... Would you be offended if I asked you to join me in my room for a night cap.
Marcie: I wouldn’t be offended....just not interested.
Jonas: Sometimes opportunity is but a fleeting moment.
Marcie: What kind of an opportunity are you referring to?
Jonas: I like you Marcie. I’ll be going back to LA tomorrow....I had to ask. Have you ever looked back on an opportunity and wondered what might have been?
Marcie: Not for a long time, Jonas.
Jonas: I’m sorry if I upset you.
Marcie: I should be getting used to it....I’m a magnet for the wrong kind of man.
Jonas: What do you mean by that?
Marcie: Say we have our little fling, and I call you Monday and your wife answers the phone.
Jonas: So you’re skeptical about my truthfulness.
Marcie: You’re a man, here in Vegas, trying to make a connection for the night, and I show up.
Jonas: (Laughing,) My God, you are a real estate woman to the core.
Marcie: And you are a smooth talking son of a gun.
Jonas: Hmmmm, (Reaches into his wallet and pulls out his card.. It has his picture and name on it along with his home telephone number. He lays it on the table, takes out his cell phone.) Dial that number please...
Marcie: (Stares him in the eye and dials the number.) Now what?
Jonas: When it rings either my housekeeper or one of my children will pick it up. Ask if you can speak to Karen.
Marcie: I don’t know if I’m up for this.
Jonas: Do it....as a favor.
Marcie: Hits the send button.
Robert: Hello, Taylor residence.
Marcie: May I please speak to Karen?
Robert: My mom died last year, were you a friend of hers?
Marcie: I’m so sorry.
Robert: If you’ll leave a message my dad can give you a call when he gets back tomorrow.
Marcie: No message, thank you.
Jonas: Feel better about me?
Marcie: Are you proud of yourself?
Jonas: You had a suspicion...you deserved an answer....we all have to be skeptical in this business.
Marcie: And what are you skeptical about Jonas?
Jonas: I’m wondering if when you get off that plane tomorrow there’ll be a husband waiting to pick you up?
Marcie: Is that right....? (Picks up her purse, takes out her wallet and puts her card on the table. Picks up her cell phone and hands it to him. ) Care to make a little call?
Jonas: (Picks up the phone, dials the number and pauses.) Who should I ask for?
Jonas: (Hits the send button.)
Jonas: To whom am I speaking?
Constance: Constance Logan....what do you want.
Jonas: Could I please speak to Larry?
Constance: (Slams down the phone)
Jonas: Guess that settles that. (They both laugh.)
Marcie: What have we become?
Jonas: Jaded.... Now that we’ve established our bona fides, how about that nite cap.
Marcie: If I say yes, will you still want to look at me in the morning.
Jonas: Still skeptical?
Marcie: (Emotional) That’s me.
Jonas: I think I’ll be wanting to look at you for a long time.
Scene 2 In the Dark Room:
Scene opens. A waiter delivers their drinks. Marcie is carrying an overnight bag. The room has a bed in the center a table to the left and a door to the bathroom on the right. On the table is a lamp. The two sit down at the table and sip their drinks.
Jonas: I’m glad you’re here.
Marcie: This isn’t how I expected to spend the evening.
Jonas: Me neither. You OK?
Jonas: Me too....I know you’re going to find this hard to believe but after Karen, you are the second woman I’ve ever been with.
Marcie: Well, after Larry, you are going to be number three....although the first one shouldn’t really count.
Jonas: What happened?
Marcie: I’d really rather not talk about it.
Jonas: What would you like to talk about?
Marcie: I would really like to get this hurdle behind us.
Jonas: Why don’t you go into the bathroom and get ready for bed.
Marcie goes in bathroom. Jonas strips down into his jockey shorts and tee shirt. He gets in bed. Marcie comes out in a nighty and gets in on the other side. Jonas turns out the light and the room is pitch black.
Jonas: I’m going to put my arm around your shoulder.
Marcie: Go ahead.
Jonas: It’s been a long time, I’m really pretty excited.
Marcie: I’m so nervous. I’m about to crawl out of my skin.
Jonas: I’m going to kiss you now.
Marcie: Come over here....ummmmm
Jonas: That was sweet....
Marcie: I’d forgotten how sweet it is. Once more, longer this time.
Jonas: Ummmm, ummmm.
Marcie: Its OK, I just wasn’t expecting it.
Jonas: My hand....
Marcie: on my breast....
Jonas: How does it feel
Marcie: Fine, I mean warm
Jonas: It's so soft.
Marcie: It startled me, thats all.
Jonas: Does this startle you...?
Marcie: Not so hard, they’re really tender.
Jonas: How’s this
Marcie: Better, just don’t squeeze.
Jonas: How about with my lips.
Marcie: Kiss me first....for a long time, kiss me.
Jonas: ummmmmm ummmm.
Marcie: Your fingers feel so good
Jonas: ummmm ummmm
Marcie: You’re a good kisser.
Jonas: Take your nighty off while I get rid of this tee shirt. (Pause)
Marcie: giggle giggle....don’t I’m so ticklish.
Jonas: Come on Marcie, I’m dying to kiss your breasts.
Marcie: Go ahead, but my nipples are really sensitive.
Jonas: Tell it to my tongue,
Marcie: Oh my goodness....my goodness gracious.
Jonas: How does that feel
Marcie: Don’t tease me, put your mouth on it, suck it.
Jonas: Like this?
Marcie: With your lips and tongue.
Jonas: ummmmm ummmn
Marcie: ohhh, ohhh....what are you doing now?
Jonas: Pulling your panties off.
Marcie: This is really happening....
Jonas: Lift your butt up, slip your thighs, over your knees, now your ankles. There
Marcie: Where are you now?
Jonas: Taking my boxers off. Putting on some lube.
Jonas: Sorry didn’t mean to step on you
Marcie: That’s OK. What do you want me to do now?
Jonas: Lay back and relax, spread your legs.
Marcie: Like this?
Jonas: Just like that.
Marcie: What are you getting ready to do?
Jonas: l think you know.... now reach up and take hold of it.
Marcie: My goodness....
Marcie: You’re bigger than Larry.
Jonas: Is that a compliment?
Marcie: I don’t know if I’m going to be able to do this.
Jonas: Give it a try.
Marcie: Here goes.....don’t be so eager, darn you.
Marcie: Give me a chance, OK? Give me a chance.
Jonas: Please hurry Marcie.
Marcie: There! Its starting to go in, take it easy, take it easy.
Jonas: I’m trying I’m trying.
Marcie: It’s going its going....its in. Phew!
Jonas: How does it feel?
Marcie: Like a size nine in a size four.
Jonas: I need you so bad.
Marcie: Relax for a minute, just relax.
Jonas: I’m trying.
Marcie: This is nothing like it was with Larry.
Jonas: Why do you keep bringing him up?
Marcie: Because I wasn’t expecting you to be....
Jonas: Quite so large?
Marcie: Something like that...OK now let's try moving together.
Jonas: Like this?
Marcie: Oh my gosh, I don’t know if I can do this.
Jonas: How about like this?
Marcie: Better, that’s better, slow and easy.
Jonas: Back and forth.
Marcie: If I had only known.
Jonas: Known what ?
Marcie: Forget it.... just don’t get too eager.
Jonas: Relax, don’t fight it.
Marcie: How can I relax with a sussage inside?
Jonas: Want to stop?
Marcie: No! I don’t want to stop. Just go easy, easy.... that’s all I’m asking.
Jonas: I’m trying, the reins are in my chest.
Marcie: OK, stop, just stop for a minute. Don’t pull it out just stop for a minute.
Jonas: What now.
Marcie: Kiss my breasts, don’t do anything but kiss my breasts.
Jonas: You taste so good.
Marcie: Suck um hard
Jonas: Now the other one.
Marcie: Tease the nipple, not your tongue, your lips.
Marcie: Now kiss me, don’t move, just kiss me, hard and long, don’t move.
Jonas: Are you coming?
Marcie: I’m coming I’m coming.....sake sake I’m coming.
Jonas: Me too me too.
Marcie: Arhhhhh Arhhhh
Jonas: Ohhhh, Ohhhhhh (Long Pause)
Jonas: You OK?
Marcie: I’m fine. Tomorrow I’ll be walking like a cow girl.
Jonas: I love you Marcie.
Marcie: Tell me that in the morning.
Jonas: I’m going to be telling you that for a long time.