Short scene from a screenplay I'm working on
|Kevin: Fuck, Alicia. I thought this was what...I mean, is this what you want--?
Alicia: --God, how am I meant to know what I want?
Kevin: Um, it's actually very easy, Liss, you just listen to your heart and feel what you feel and then use the English language to explain it to me!
Alicia: Well, I don't know what it is, Kevin, okay?!?
Kevin: That's bullshit. Bull--
Alicia: --Well, if it's so easy, tell me what you want, then.
Kevin: Fine. I thought I had told you, but obviously it wasn't loud enough the first time.
Alicia: What do you--?
Kevin: [Shouts in her ear] I love you. I love you, okay? I love you. I fucking love you, you arrogant bitch. I fucking love you.
Alicia: What do you expect me to say to that?
Kevin: Well, other than the obvious?
Alicia: I can't tell you the same thing, Kevin, I just can't.
Kevin: Well, then, what the fuck are we doing here?!? I've been with you, by your side, held your hand for four years. And not once have you told me you loved me, not once have I questioned it. But I'm asking you now. How do you feel?
Alicia: I don't know!
Kevin: Tell me, Alicia.
Alicia: I can't!
Kevin: Tell me!
Alicia: I don't love you!!! [Short pause] Okay...I just...oh god. I...I feel nothing. I'm hollow. I'm empty.
Kevin: How is that possible, Alicia? How? After four years...
Alicia: I don't know, I can't--
Kevin: Was it al a lie? Did you ever feel anything? I'm listening...
Alicia: I don't know. I think so. Yes. I just...I have little time for pain or feeling. [Pause]. They wrenched their way in and clutched hold of something; somewhere which it took days, months, years to extract from. Now you expect me to laugh, to cry, to feel these things - to love you?!? I don't know. I just don't know. That thing -- the beast which forced its way into--latched upon...lived off, was damaged forever. Fatally scarred. I don't know how to love anymore. I can't do what you're asking me.
[Pause. Kevin sinks to the ground with his head in his hands.]
I'm sorry. I don't know. What are we going to do?
[Kevin lifts his head and gazes intensely in front of him, deep in thought for a moment. He rises and strides to near the doorway, where his tie lies on the floor. Alicia looks up and around from her place on the bed.]
What are you doing?
[He lifts his collar and begins to do his tie. She gets up, grabs his arm and shakes him.]
What are you doing?
[He does not acknowledge her, but finishes doing his tie and walks down the hall to the coatstand. She scrambles after him.]
[Screams, cries.] What are you doing?
[He opens the door; she stops it and grabs his face, kisses him. He does not move, doesn't look at her.]
What are you doing, baby? What are you doing? You leaving me? What are you doing?
[He looks at her intensely, but without feeling.]
Kevin: What do you want?
[She doesn't/cannot answer, her mouth is suspended open. He waits for a moment.]
[Yells, tears form in his eyes, his rage and upset is uncaged.] What do you want?!?
[She doesn't answer, but grabs his hand, presses it to her cheek and shakes her head back and forth, eyes closed, then looking at him, pleading. He regards her, then pulls back his hand sharply.]
What do you want?
[Alicia backs away slightly, her hands to her mouth, shaking her head, cries. He slaps her. She falls to the ground. He leaves and slams the door behind him. She is stunned that he is gone, and remains on the floor. She sobs hard for a few moments.]
Alicia: [To herself.] He didn't look back.
[The door opens and Ella walks in.]
Alicia: [Yells, cries.] He didn't look back!
[She sobs. Fade.]