The end of the world - rule one: don't attempt to survive
|AHH.... It's the end of the world!
Calm down, lets face it, it's not that bad. You're, almost certainly, about to die, as is everyone for that matter. So why not make the most of it. Follow these simple rules and the end of the world could be the most joyful experiences of your life.
Rule one: Don't attempt to survive.
Attempting to survive is the the biggest mistake you can make when the world is about to end, (except of course the fools who try to write there memoirs just before they are about to die. For a start you will never finish in time and secondly who is going to read them when everyone is dead) however attempting to survive is also the most commonly made mistake. People running in and out of buildings, up and down stairs, and doing whatever they can to avoid standing under low hanging wire, because that is obviously your biggest worry, the world is about to be obliterated and all you care about is running away from wire thats 27 centimeters lower than it was before.
A man once wrote a book, which was about a book, and on the front cover of the book that the book was about, were the words 'Don't Panic'. Now in normal circumstances this would be fairly reasonable advice, that is of course had it not been writen by a man who thought it would be a good idea to write a book about a book that was infinitely better than the book he was writing, even though that book did not truly exist. So I shall not give you that advice. Instead I shall give you this advice. 'Do not follow your instincts'.
When you are about to die, and you know it, your survival instincts automatically kick in. This is a bad thing, survival instincts kicking in means that you think you could possibly survive, this leads to hope, hope leads to belief, belief leads to hunger for what you want and hunger for survival is a very bad thing. People turn on one another attempting to get the best out of a bad situation instead of getting on with their own buisness.
The other instinct that kicks in is 'fight or flight'. Neither of these a good option. You can not fight the inevitable, and even attempting to is a bigger waste of energy than trying to teach bad words to a dog before realising that it is actually a type of bird that mimics you, then going out, catching a dove, then losing that dove, then settling for a pigoen instead, then trying to teach it said words for 3 hours before finally realising that it is actually a parot that you needed but this is no longer worth your time. On the other hand, the other option, attempting to run from the problem is an even bigger waste of time, if the world is going to end then obviously going anywhere in the world to hide is completely pointless. No matter where you are, you will still die. so the only way to go into space, but lets face it if you go that way there really is not alot to do once your up there, and you will only survive as long as your life support systems can carry you for.
So when it comes to the end of the world, do not attempt to survive. Accept your fate and get along with the final moments of your life and do all you can to enjoy them.