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Rated: 18+ · Non-fiction · Music · #1629050
I knocked them dead and never went back
My Greatest Accordion Performance
'Close your eyes and just play to me'

Once upon a time...
I went to the 'Dallas Accordion Association' meeting
over in Ft. Worth one evening after work.
I had bought a new accordion
and had not intended to play but just to show
the accordion to a friend.
I had been on a '250 square commercial roofing job'
all day in the summer heat,
had tar on my knees,
hadn't eaten or had a bath,
and had drunk '10 beers' on the way home
to get my accordion and driving to Ft. Worth.

As it so happened a realtor who wanted 'my 25 acres'
and had been kicked out of the association for bad mouthing me,
and had paid $10. each for each one of about 60-70 women
from 'MADD' to join the association to vote me out.
Rather than 13 people, like I expected there were,
when I walked in the door,
not only about 100 women from MADD.

But the head accordion teacher in Dallas, Natasha Gedding.
An accordionist who had a tape out and was real good,
Alan Walling of 'Alpinmusikanten',
and basically everybody who was anybody
with accordions was there.

Someone asked me to go sign up to play,
and so I did.

Boys it was a set up.
When time came for me to play,
they all started yelling and booing.
I am hard of hearing anyway and I just couldn't hear to play.
I tried and tried.
And didn't understand the reason for all the commotion.
I would start one song and get yelled down.
I would start another and the booing was impossible
to over come so I just stopped.

I closed my eyes and held my hands open,
palms up and said:
"Help me Carol."
Took a deep breath
and as the room got a little quieter,
started to play.

{Actually the accordion repairman,
the accordion tuner, at Natasha's request
walked over to the realtors seat and said
'loud enough for everybody in the big room to hear him':
I didn't see it because my eyes were closed,
but somebody told me about it later.}

"The cops are on the way",
"one more word,
and you are going to jail",

And Bryan Cepac stood and said:
"He's hard of hearing!
give him a chance!"

The room got real quiet,
Carol was my girl friend from Denver
and was in fact still in Denver
but was my spirtual guide too
I had said 'help me Carol'
I heard Carol's voice,
as if she were there, say:
"Keep your eyes closed
so that you can't see all those people
'and play to me',
just play to me I'll listen".

I started playing and played for '20 minutes',
{I heard later}
Stopped on 'Du Du Leicht Meir im Hertzen'
or 'You, You, the One of my Heart'.
Opened my eyes,
and made a formal bow like a classical pianist would,
in perfect silence,
and started walking back to my seat.
All of a sudden the whole room broke out in applause,
It was deafening!
I thought they were all going to jump on me
but they loved it.

The realtor was sued by the association for half a million,
someone asked Natasha if she would give 'this guy' lessons
and she said with tears in her eyes:
"I would 'take' lessons from him."
"My father was Russian and he loved that song."

The guy with the tape out, Allan, said:
Everything I play is exactaly the same every time.
My material is all memorized.
This guy doesn't know from one second to the next
what he is going to play.
It's all improvisation,
he plays what he hears in his mind.
I would give anything if I could improvise like that.
I just can't do that.

And the waitress said to me
'as I was getting me a beer':
"That was the best anyone has ever played
in here,

Boys the material was well...
Mexican music like the 'Corredo Coyote',
the ballad of the Coyote.
{"The Coyote is just out looking for something
for his family to eat."}
A Mexican lady from 'MADD' said:
"I haven't heard that song since I was a little girl!"
And became so hysterical she had to be taken from the room.
"I'd marry that man!"

German songs like the' Horst Wessel lied',
where a table of 'Germans' stood and gave the Hitler salute.
During the whole song, because:
"It is not legal to play that song in Germany."
"Or to give the Hitler salute,
but that's part of the song,
to stand and salute during its playing
and we have never done that in our lives,
its the S.A. marching song
but it's legal here,
and it was fun!"
"We'll never forget it."
Ha Ha, and with a tango ending!
Ha Ha...

Russian Baliliakas,
Supe's light calvery overture,
The sextet from Lucia de Lammermoor,
by Giatano Donnezetti
{that killed them}

Good bye old paint,
Bonnie blue flag,
Du, Du, Licht mir im Hertzen,
the Marines Hymn.

Not only the requisite
Waltzes, Marches and Polkas,
every grade of music from Cowboy songs
like 'Goodby Old Paint',
'Legend of Lobo',
Mexican Corredo's,
to classics like 'Opera',
Music from every country
and every time period,
and every economic class,
all run together in one giant medly,
two or three or four or five...
verses from each piece,
all mixed up,
it \was insane!...
but beautiful.

It was my greatest performance
I knocked them dead
and never went back


J. Winters von Knife
{need a knife?}

Thank you

J. Winters von Knife

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