by Tracy Bailey
It probably looks stupid. But it's deeply personal, however I wanted to share it
It might look stupid that I'm actually writing this, but I feel its time. I have never felt this strange before , this sad and lonely even though I am surrounded with people.
I have probably reached a stop in this life, where I am continuously discovering something new. Even though I'm still young, I feel that I can enter a hole, a very deep hole which can take a very long time to get out of. I always wonder, life itself. We are created for a reason, but what is the reason? How is love truly described? What is love? That affectionate feeling felt towards a living, moving body. What is the pain? The inner pain felt when that body is gone, disappeared. The pain starts spreading like venom, killing softly that love which was once built with care and protection. However , they say you can still love and feel the love of the dead. How is it possible to feel the love of a dead person, now buried in ground with no more life? With every step I take I feel silly, feeling that love. But I really do. Something inside of me, tells me that you are still here with me. Even though I never saw you or I saw you once or twice. Your love is a mixture which with every thought, the mixture comes to me in the form of nature or life itself.
I don't know what will happen. Right now, I am sad but happy at the same time. I can feel that finally I found peace at heart. I miss you ; I still am confused on how things like these happen and you only realize years later. I'm sorry.