| It was August and I was at the top of my professional career, Chief of Police. I had climbed up my professional ladder in a matter of ten years. I had started as a non-paid reserve police officer and had worked my way through to the top. I had the oppurtunity to be a traffic officer: patrol officer; undercover narcotics officer; investigator; special crimes investigator; and now I was the Chief of Police. I was not happy, I had dove into my work and had become distant from the most important to me. I missed holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, and I had become a stranger to my family. I mean we would do Sunday morning church but as an obligation. I had become my job. I was good at my job and had left everything and everyone else behind. I would work all day and all evening, most nights, and when I was home I spent most of my time on one of my three cell phones. On my vacation days I would teach at the local law enforcement academy. During my romantic nights out I was usually the key note speaker at some law enforcement class graduations or Child Advocacy center fundraiser. I had lost my wife and kids and didn't even know it.
I was also a small business owner, I soled police, fire, and EMS supplies and equipment on the internet. My business partner was my good friend and we also had a local store front where we carried sporting goods along side the public service suppies. My business partner was also a law enforcement officer and we worked many late night shifts together. He and I were also on the narcotics taskforce together where we were members of the SWAT team. He was the commander and I was either the sniper or the first through the door. You could say we could trust each other with our lives.
Before I realized what had happened to me I was sharing intimate conversations about my family with a female officer I had been working with. I didn't realize it until it was too late but I had began to do what would be the beging of the destruction of my career. I had been married once begore and I had brought a son into this marriage. My wife and son never really got along and there were problems getting ready to explode. There was no respect either way and one day my son went to far and my wife ordered that if I was going to have any kind of relationship with my son it would have to be somewhere else. I took those words literally and moved out. Soon the female officer I began to put my confidence in was become a close friend. She wanted to spend time with my son and my other children alike. She treated them all the same but there was a sinister plan in the works. A plan I wouldn't see until much later.
It was hard being away from my wife and my kids and soon I was drinking. I was hurting more and more everyday from injuries I had received in the first Gulf War so I began to self-medicate with alcohol. Soon I was drinking all the time I was not working. It began to take more and more alcohol to heal the hurt as the time went by.
One day I went to my store and met with my partner, I told him I had had it with all of the problems and was ready to stop hurting so much. He prayed a simple prayer for me, he prayed God would close the doors that needed to be closed and open the doors that needed to be opened. I thanked him and went to my office at city hall, it wasn't but 30 minutes and the mayor was calling me into his office. As I walked into his office I noticed one of my patrol officers and the city secretary in the office. This was not good, I had been on the other side of this in the past and I knew exactly wahat was going to happend next. I was beiging fired and for no good reason. I could surely fight this but I remembered the prayer from this morning. Remember the sinister plan well it turned out I had entrusted the female officer with the keys to the evidence room and she had stolen three thousand dollars which now I was being blames for. So in a matter of minutes my career was down the tubes. I cleared my desk and went home. A fellow officer heard the news and brought me a bottle of liquor to help me feel better. It didn't.
As I sat on my couch drinking I look at the coffee table and there was my pistol, a Kimber .45, auto. I knew what was next, it was time to finish this. I finished the bottle of liquor and staggered to the table where i had placed my gun. I grabbed it with my right hand, it was already loaded and ready. What came next I never expected, I fell to my knees dropped the gun and blackied out. I opened my eyes and now I was in a forest. The trees were thick and it was dark. I had been a soldier and was good about finding my way but I felt so lost. I began to walk around searching for a way out but I couldn't find anything. I was so lost, I became frantic. In desperation I began to run searching for a wasy out. I became tired and sat on the ground with my back against a tree in defeat. I was not use to being a quitter but I had given up.
As I sat there I looked up and a beam of light shined upon me. I strong, but conforting voice began to speak saying ,"Son I know you are lost but do not worry I will help you find your way". I woke up in the middle of the my living room kneeling on the floor. I felt confused but comforted, I was sober and my mind was clear. I called my wife and asked if she would take me back I would be the man of God I needed to be. Ever since that day I have quit drinking, I have quit smoking, and I strive everyday to be a better man of God than the last. I am not the man I ought to be yet, but thank God I'm not the man I use to be. I asked God if He were real that he was going to have to show me and He has. He has restored my family and my life. I know Jesus is real and is leading me everyday. Praise God.