by Mara Levina
A Final Goodbye to a Beloved Pet
|Hey there, little man, I know you don't feel good.
I'm gonna take you to the doctor, hold on, ok? Let's get in the car, even though I know you're scared.
I'm gonna wrap you in a blanket to make you feel safe as we drive to the vet...
Remember the first time you tried to play with water in the tub? Boy, you found out real quick that you didn't like being wet:)
As far as Tuxedo cats go, you're the smartest out there, learning tricks like a dog. I named you Germany because you like to start fights that you can't win, did you know that?
The vet is gentle as he checks you out, he says he can tell you don't feel good because you weren't scared when he touched you. I know it's because I'm there. Don't worry, we're almost done, ok?I know that needle hurt when they took a blood sample for a test...
I'm so glad you were there after my back surgeries, I coudn't have done without you laying next to me as I recovered. No one else was that patient with me; that's why I showered you with treats.
The doctor comes back in and gives me bad news and you look at me with a question in your eyes as I start crying. The vet says he will give me some time with you as he gives you something to make you sleepy. Come here honey, curl up in mommy's lap, I know you're still not feeling good...
When you were born, your mother only had two kittens, and I saw why. You were so big and you grew so fast. Everyone who saw you was surprised at how big and fluffy you were. I was so proud of my 'handsome man.'
Hey baby, don't worry, you'll feel better soon. Just let me hold you, and I will talk to you about food and treats and how much I love you as you fall asleep, purring softly and knowing that you're safe as long as you're in my arms. Let's go home, ok? You'll feel better soon...
The doctor and his nurse gave me their condolences as I left my little man there, asleep, awaiting euthanasia due to kidney failure. I'm crying and in shock as I get in the car, my husband's words of comfort barely registering.
My heart is broken, my world a little less colorful, but I find solace in the fact that Germany fell asllep purring and that the last words he heard were mine, saying, "Let's go home."
- For my cat Germany, 6/05-1/11