Everyone is obsessed with global warming. Why? It isn't real
Imagine. All of the scientists are in agreement. Canada is in imminent danger of being attacked. Not by the U.S. though, nor by the Middle East, terrorists, or any country on Earth. But by yetis! The media is in a frenzy about it and leaders of several countries are spending loads of money to defend themselves from attacks. Because of all the hubbub, we, the general public, are scared to death that the yetis are going to rule us all. And yet, there are a few reasonable voices starting to speak out against this prediction. They are saying to the world, “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let’s slow down and think about this. Is this really going to happen? I mean really, YETIS!!!!!!!” Likewise, I am going to be that reasonable voice, not about yetis, but about man-made global warming.
It’s the only mythical thing that could send scientists into a tizzy, scare the crap out of the general public, and have leaders of multiple countries spending loads of money at the exact same time. Unfortunately, because of the fuss people have made, not many people agree with me. However, due to some information that just came out and the remarks of some very important scientists, the idea that the man-made global warming does not exist is becoming more and more popular. Today we’ll look at some key points, like how the results have been skewed, the people getting the facts right are being threatened or used, man-made global warming isn’t doing anything the scientists propose it is doing, and the earth hasn’t even been warming
First of all, the results have been messed with. As it turns out, President Obama, helped by Former Vice President Al Gore, Senators Barbara Boxer, John F. Kerry, and others may have lied our great nation into a war against the man-made global warming menace. We got this information by looking at thousands of emails and documents taken from the computers of the Climate Research Unit at England's University of East Anglia. We don’t know how this information came to us, whether through a hacker or through a mole. But this information suggests that the CRU scientists have been holding back and misstating data. They have also working to make sure that conflicting information from other scientists does not come out to the public. This is very unsettling, seeing that our powerful politicians are lying to us about something that would be very important were it real.
Plus, the people who are getting the facts right are being threatened or used. Oregon State Climatologist George Taylor is in danger of being fired, for the only reason of stating that most climate change is because of natural means, not because of the carbon dioxide we humans are emitting. The governor of Oregon has threatened Landsea, trying to get him to resign. And the Oregon state legislature has tried to pass a bill that would remove Landsea from his office. According to Prof. Paul Reiter of the Pasteur Institute in Paris, the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) is a sham. It holds names of scientists who disagreed with the IPCC’s climate predictions. Prof. Reiter said, “That is how they make it seem that all of the top scientists are agreed.” He was only able to get his name off the list through a lawsuit with the IPCC.
This may come as a bit of a surprise but neither 2007 or 2008 were the warmest years on record. But in fact, the warmest year recorded globally was 1995. From Paul Hudson, the climate correspondent of the BBC News; “ For the last 11 years we have not observed any increase in global temperatures. Our climate models did not forecast it, even though man-made carbon dioxide, the gas thought to be responsible for warming our planet, has continued to rise.” So what on earth is going on?
It’s bad enough that people think the temperature of the earth is rising because of us, but scientists are also trying to say that global warming is causing hurricanes and melting icebergs. Yet we have very high ranking scientists disagreeing with everyone else. Chris Landsea, now the Science and Operations Officer at the National Hurricane Center, resigned from the IPCC in 2005, sick of their bias. With the information that he collected in the summer of ’04, Landsea had found no indication that global warming caused the Atlantic hurricane season. And we all know that global warming is causing the ice to melt, right? The penguins are in trouble! The polar bears are going to die! However, a French physicist of the Institute of Geophysics in Paris, Claude Allegre, has been one of the biggest opponents of this theory. He has found proof that the Antarctic glacier is growing, not shrinking like they want us to think. Allegre has also found that Kilimanjaro glacier’s retreat has had nothing to do with the carbon dioxide we produce.
And so you see, there is a simple solution to the man-made global warming threat. Just think about what the media and scientists are telling us. Just open your mind to the idea that man-made global warming does not exist. As soon as you heard my topic you probably thought I was an idiot for thinking this. Those thoughts are just further proof that you have been brainwashed by the scientists. My goal with this oratory is to steer your mind away from the menace of global warming exists.
I know for some of you, my goal has fallen short. You still think the same thing, that global warming exists and it is caused by us humans. Now, when we try to think of causes of global warming, the first thing that pops into our head is transportation; gas guzzling cars, and giant airplanes. Yet this couldn’t be more further from the truth. From a United Nations report, released on November 29, 2006: “cattle rearing generates more global warming gases than transportation.” Yes that’s right! Raising livestock is more harmful to the environment. Now even though “the livestock sector accounts for 9 percent of CO2 from human activities”, livestock also generates 65 percent of the nitrous oxide associated with humans. And this nitrous oxide? It’s 296 times as warming as carbon dioxide. Not only this, but 37 percent of human-produced methane, which is 23 times as warming as CO2, and 64 percent of ammonia, the main cause for acid rain, are cause by livestock. So looking back on this, we can see that our cars may not be the biggest problem. There is actually a plausible solution to this. A scientist working down in Charleston, South Carolina, Dr. Vladimir Mironov, is in every qualification, a mad scientist. He is trying to figure out how to grow meat in a lab. This will take out the methane burping, and the nitrous-oxide-producing manure.