Formspring's favourite penguin doesn't like being stuck indoors
|Tap-tap-tap went the little beak on the window. "Let me out!" pleaded the little penguin. "I won't run away this time!"
"Hrmm," pondered the big penguin. "That's what you said last time. You were gone for three weeks then!"
"Yes, but that's only because I found this trail of bagels in the woods and I had to find out where they went to!" Explained the bored little penguin, eager to escape this stifling captivity. "Wouldn't you do the same thing?"
"Hrmm," considered the big penguin. "I suppose that bagels are impossible to resist. But that's still no excuse for spending so long away!"
The little penguin shuffled her feet awkwardly, looking at the floor and blushing. "Well I would have been back sooner, but I fell over and with my belly so full of bagel yumminess I was too round to get up again."
"Pff, you silly little penguin! That's impossible pish posh and you know it."
"And then I rolled down the Big Hill and fell in the river and was washed over the Candyfloss Falls!" continued the little penguin, not wanting to relive the embarrassing adventure she had had.
"I thought you said you ran away last time though," pointed out the big penguin. "Are you changing your story, or something? That's ever so naughty."
"But... but... I didn't run away LAST time... I ran away the time before that! Last time was just a big misunderstanding!" explained the fidgeting little penguin.
"So where did you run away to the time before last, then? I will have to make certain you don't try to do that again, of course."
"Well... " began the little penguin, "I went to visit my favourite and sexiest of friend, everyone's favourite Beginner Troll, you see... He promised to help me with my maths homework and we had so much fun I just lost track of time!"
"But... But he lives in Qatar! That's THOUSANDS of miles away!!"
"Yes, that's the other reason I was gone so long that time... But pweeease can I go outside? It's snowing and all I want to do is build a snowtroll!" begged the bored little penguin.
"How big will this snowtroll be? I seem to remember last year you made one that was three time bigger than our house and you decided to live in its belly for a week and refused to come in for dinner!"
"I was having friends over! And mummy didn't mind. She brought me lemonade and sammiches and sang us songs and gave us colouring books and glitter! Why won't you let me go out? Why why why?" The little penguin stamped her foot and waddled in circles, getting upset at this terribly unfair treatment.
"Well for a start I can see your friends out there playing in the snow. You know, those naughty perverted ones that are a terribly bad influence on you. Why can't you be more like that nice girl Vee? She's ever-so good and wholesome, and nobody can say different!"
"But I like Vee too! I just like all my friendly friends and want to play with them! Pweeease let me go and I promise I won't do anything bad like Cleo keeps trying to make me do! Honestly!" The little penguin's smile was so honest and innocent and sweet and lovely that the big penguin couldn't refuse any longer. The little penguin jumped and skipped and pranced out the door to join her friends. "Hurray!" she sang as she went.
Her friends were at the bottom of a slope beneath her house, so the little penguin flopped onto her belly and slid all the way down to them, bowling them down like skittles when she arrived. They didn't mind at all though, for everyone loved the sexy little penguin everso much and were all thrilled to see her at last!
"Hewwo errywun!" she giggled as she picked herself up from the middle of the pile. "What shall we do today?"
"Let's build an iceberg and sink some ships!" suggested Lj.
"Let's get nekkid and have a massive orgy!" was Brooke's idea.
"Why don't we all spam Vee with dirty words and peaches!" giggled Cassandra, which Mariah thought was a fun idea too.
"Lets all go to my place and run around naked!" offered Emma.
"Why don't you all do my homework for me?" asked Ry.
"Oi, that's cheating!" noticed Heather.
"Where's the idiot?" tiny wanted to know
"EnglandEnglandEnglandEnglandEngland!" was all Sneha had to say on the subject.
"Let's go back inside and troll Yahoo!" Chair Wizard put forward.
"As long as there's Koreans and incest, I wanna be there!" Cleo announced.
"Why can't we just stay here and play in the snow?" Cammy wanted to know.
"I'm sticking with Cammy," Abe insisted
"Lets do everything!" September argued, and that was met with much approval from everyone.
So the little penguin disappeared off and spent the next seven weeks having a wonderful time with all her friends, dancing and prancing and getting up to all sorts of mischief and sexiness all about the place, waddling here and there and everywhere too.
I'd say that this is the end, but surely we all know that the sssexxxyyyyy little penguin will have many more adventures to come, and those ones will surely be described in actual detail!
So.... the middle . . ?