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Rated: 13+ · Sample · Death · #1906420
It's only 3 small paragraphs but I would love a bit of feedback.
It's called, "The last thing"

The last thing I remember was saying goodnight to my little brother for our goodnight ritual. He would come into my room and hop on my bed, and then I would give him butterfly kisses, whisper a fact in his ear and say goodnight. The fact that I told him that night was, “Humans are the only animals that can cry emotional tears”.  That somehow seems relevant now.


As you can probably tell, I went to sleep one night and didn't wake up. I don’t know what happened to me. I died in my sleep but I don’t know how it happened. I understand why this happened to me though. I’m a good person; I don’t get in trouble that much. My life has been great! The only thing is that my brother is sick; or was sick, I should say. I saved his life, but traded my own. This is my story.

First, I should tell you about my family. There’s me, Charlotte, my brother, Benedict, my sister, Elizabeth, my mom, Marie, and my step-dad, Greg. My dad, Walter, is still alive. I live with him on the weekends and on school breaks. I’m close with everyone in my family except Greg, we don’t have a lot on common and sometimes he does things that make me extremely agitated. Mom and Greg have been married since I was about 5 or 6 years old, but he’s known me since I was around 2 years old. He's also my brother and sisters dad.
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