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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2021233-Homework-is-Bliss
Rated: E · Other · Satire · #2021233
Satire on homework
         Homework. That one word makes me smile without a doubt just in the shape of an arch. Homework has survived throughout the ages, even longer than the dinosaurs. That's how we know it is an excellent way to measure our intelligence. Everyone knows the dinosaurs went extinct because they couldn't do their homework. We are smart only when we can do all our homework. It defines our lives' worth, so if you miss an assignment you might as well wear a sign saying, "I'm a worthless dinosaur."

         Homework is superb for your health. It makes sure you don't sleep in. In fact, it makes you sleep less, so you waste less of your day by that useless sleep. Who needs sleep when you have energy drinks and caffeine? I know I don't. As an added bonus, it keeps your blood-pressure high, so you never need to worry about experience roller-coasters of anxiety because you're always anxious.

         Everyone complains that teachers must hate them because they assign heaps of homework, but deep down students know that's not true. Homework is just tough love from teachers, just as the Holocaust and World Wars are just tough love from God(s)/Universe (not to offend any religion/belief). However, the reality is that teachers just assign homework because they love to grade it. Teachers have homes? Psh, we all know they live at school. Why do you think we turn in essays that take us hours to write and get them back in less than a week? The math just doesn't add up, unless they live at school.

         Homework. It's just something we all love deep down inside. We should be praying and worshipping it, yet we curse it to the depths of hell. It helps us in so many ways and harms us in none. So next time your teacher gives you a 200 page paper due the next day just go up with your smile in the shape of an arch and say, "Thank you."          



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