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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2072989-Banished
Rated: E · Draft · Comedy · #2072989
a Weird draft for a story, i need practice and advice on my writing style
Today wasn't an all that bad day considering my first day of being banished to an alien planet. I survived nearly being swallowed by a ten foot monstrosity, got a decent meal, and most importantly, i made a friend. I think.
So, i wake up on the planet after a harsh scorning by the dark universe overlord, i wake up. Like it was a long distant dream. That's when i realized i was banished. I took it kind of hard. What was i missing? I was a hard working determined employee. Why did he fire me?? Either way, after a gallon of tears and snot and... some other fluids i can't comprehend, i stood up thinking of survival. If i were the dark lord and i banished someone, it would be on a hard core survival planet right? So i walk around in this thick dark forest not really sure what to do, when suddenly i stumble strait into a bus sign. Crazy right?? So anyways, i decide to wait for a bus thinking: Hey, this might not even be so hard?
But then this guy stands next to me. He was tall. Like, i know i'm short and all, but he was really tall.
"Do you think this is normal? The vertical pipelines are too narrow compared the blue ones i have at home." He pulled out this dripping alien organ out of his pocket and starts asking me gross questions about alien anatomy.
I stood there in silence and disgust until he says: "You think i'm odd don't you?"
I nodded.
"Fine, just don't answer me, i don't need the answers, i just lay there, and question my reality!" he raised his voice, nearly reaching its limits
"But i don't know the answer!" I was honestly innocent, how could he not see that?
"If course you don't, you're too short." What an original insult i thought. He pointing out my sadly obvious flaws.
"Hey, that was uncalled for!" I snapped back at him, but with a squeaky girly pitched voice like mine, he would not be threatened i thought.
"That's funny, so was my childhood, but you don't see me complaining do you!?" for some reason he was getting emotional on me, as if i'd known him for years.
"Who the heck are you man????" I wanted him off my back. Time to get down to bussiness.
"No, who the heck are you???"Finally a reasonable question for a stranger to ask.
"Syrup!" I had no good comebacks though. So i decided to be honest.
"Max but call me Doc!" Oddly specific and strange to shout at someone.
"Nice to meet you!!" i was a bit angry still.
"Go away!!!" With that he ended our "conversation".
In frustration i turned myself to the road, waiting for the bus, still having no idea where it would take me but hopefully it would take me away from this weirdo. He still lingered around, but didn't interact with me. Except for the part where he was breathing on me. that was weird.
Eventually, it did come! And to my delight, it was only double my height, which means i could easily get on and off the buss. What a lucky streak i was having. Kind of.
Unfortunately that weird guy wanted to come with and tried squeeze himself into the already compact buss. I told him no, but he wasn't having any of it, having amazingly all his body parts fit inside the bus, except for his elbows slightly sticking out the bus and knees bending the ceiling a slight bit.
"Where are you going?" He asked with that deep voice of his.
"I don't know." I gave him no eye contact, trying to state the fact that i really didn't want to talk. especially not to him.
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