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Rated: 13+ · Script/Play · Comedy · #2090945
Julia weasels her way out of multiple unpleasant interactions.
(Julia, a 22 year old woman, stands at the side of a street in a dark city neighborhood. A man approaches her, he seems slightly drunk.)

Creepy man: Hey! Girl! it ain't safe out this late around here.

Julia: Then why are you here?

Creepy man: I was coming to check on you! It’s a dangerous place for a pretty girl like you.

Julia: I’ll be fine.

Creepy man: (comes closer) Say you’re fine? I can agree with that. What’s your name, darling?

Julia: I need you to leave me alone.

Creepy man: (starts to circle her) Charlotte! Am I right? You look like a charlotte. Or is it Cathy?

Julia: (she turns with him to continue facing him) I really don’t have time to talk to you. Nor do I want to.

Creepy man: You don’t have time? What are you so busy doing?

Julia: I have a doctor’s appointment.

Creepy man: To hell ya do!! Nobody has doctors appointments in the middle of the night! (scoffing, leering)

Julia: Well I do, and it’s a very important one too.

Creepy man: Oh really? You look ok to me. Better than ok actually.

Julia: Yeah well I’m not ok at all. Infact I’m very sick. And it’s contagious. Very contagious. I should probably be in quarantine, I bet that’s what the doctor will tell me when I see him.

Creepy man: What the hell is quarantine? What are you talking about, girl?

Julia: Quarantine is when someone is so dangerously sick that they need to be completely isolated from any other living organisms because they risk infecting them by just by being near them. I wouldn’t suggest getting that close…

Creepy man: What kinda sickness do you have?

Julia: Parasites. A lot of them, and they’re really, really gross, trust me. Deadly too.

Creepy man: What?

Julia: Yeah. Ever heard of Rot Worms? They burrow under the skin and release toxins into the bloodstream that dissolve the flesh and make it more easily digestible. I am quite literally decomposing alive.

Creepy man: Oh… (starting to look a little worried)

Julia: I might look ok, but that’s only because the nests are on my back, where you can’t see them. It’s gotten pretty bad. Actually I can feel the pus oozing down my back and soaking into my pants right now. It’s warm too. Kind of feels good on my mushy, loose, decomposing flesh-

(Creepy man walks away as she is speaking, then runs, stumbling into trashcans and tripping on the curb. Julia watches him leave, then pulls out her cell phone and angrily dials a number)

Julia: Jeremy! Where are you!... I know you’re not at work, that music is way to loud… You forgot??? This is the SECOND date in a row that you blow off!!... No Jeremy, YOU’RE the bitch!... I am NOT lucky to have you… I don’t care how many girls are flirting with you at the club! I’ll have you know that guys flirt with me too! In fact I just had to turn one down!... No, nothing happened, and stop calling me babe… We’re over Jeremy!!... SHUT UP! I do NOT need you! I would take flesh dissolving parasites over you any day!.. . Yeah, you heard me! (hangs up)

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