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Rated: ASR · Prose · Comedy · #2116159
A brief introduction to a group of kids and their scouting high jinks.
Beacon Scout Oath
*Raise the four fingers of your right hand and look straight ahead.*
As a Beacon Scout I do solemnly swear to be a guiding beacon to my peers by being adroit, effulgent, munificent, parsimonious, propitious, sagacious, salubrious, and sesquipedalian.

Do you have what it takes to be a leader among your peers? Do you want to learn new skills and make new friends? Do you want your parents off your back about going outside? Are you between the ages of 8 and 12? Then join the Beacon Scouts! These unique scouts make up for our town's lack of all other scouting groups since the incident. The Beacon scouts learn how to lead, create, and study in a variety of fun activities. The scouts are lead by a dedicated, committed, mildly interested, paid set of adult leaders. And it's all absolutely free*! So sign up today. Contact beaconscouts@genericemail.com or call 555-0018 today!**
*Donations are heavily encouraged.
**Between the hours of 1:00p.m. and 1:30 p.m.***
***Look, just email us, okay? Who even uses phones anymore?

Beacon Scout Dress Code
The Beacon Scout colors are yellow and brown. Shirts should be yellow and bottoms should be brown (tan is acceptable in a pinch). The shirt should probably be a shirt that looks classy but holds up outdoors. Bottoms can be pocketed shorts in the summers, pocketed pants during the colder seasons, or pocketed skirts (pockets are the important part). Hats are available for purchase and must be worn*. Beacon Scouts may choose from baseball, beret, and bucket style hats*. The Beacon Scout sash must be worn whenever in uniform (Sashes provided free of charge. So be grateful.). Beacon scouts must wear closed toe shoes.
*And the fact we are sponsored by a hat manufacturer has nothing to do with it we assure you.

The Beacon Scout Handbook
The Beacon scout handbook was written by the famous survival and outdoors expert Zachariah Zane under protest. It contains everything a Beacon Scout has to know, from camping to bird watching to escaping from straight jackets, to fire safety. It may not look impressive, but this handy guide will serve a Beacon Scout not only through their time with the scouts, but well into adulthood!

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