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by Weta
Rated: ASR · Column · LGBTQ+ · #2127891
Why being CIS gendered is fine

Here’s the thing, I am a CIS straight woman who is oh so tired of the CIS community complaining about the word or label CIS. But the negativity has come from our community. Is it because it implies that we are the other?, no it doesn’t, but if it was used in this manner what is so wrong about suggesting that the LGBTQ community is the norm. Why should we find that threatening, is it out of a sense of guilt for the way we the CIS community have historically and in Australia still discriminate, and that perhaps if we are the other then we too could lose our entitlements. Or is it much more simple we don’t like the label. We as a group don’t like others making assumptions about what it is to be CIS, as if we are all the same. Then Please if that’s the case, stop being such a CISSY. Take a step back and look how our community has labeled, medicalised, criminalized and isolated our brothers and sisters in the LGBTQ world, and continue to do so.

I read a blog recently where the individual said the word CIS took away the complexity of their sexuality, HOW?... CIS means that you are a person whose self-identity conforms with the gender that corresponds to their biological sex. But being CIS (I should know this as I am) has nothing to do with sexuality; A CIS person can be gay, straight, lesbian, queer or asexual. A Trans person can be can be gay, straight, lesbian, queer or asexual.
They could have said the label straight takes away from the complexity. As this term does define who and what I sleep with, by assigning the label straight to myself means that I sleep with members of the opposite sex exclusively, and this is where it gets complex, what if I only sleep with men but I had a lesbian experience when I was younger? These questions and feeling are the beautiful complexities we face. But that lesbian experience did not change or affect how I am entirely well aligned with my biologic sex, if anything it re-enforced it.

Or are we frustrated by the word CIS because the trans community is stepping with pride and expecting us to change our world. Now we have to be aware of pronouns, of bathrooms, now we might not always know. GOOD. I cannot say that I will ever understand what it is like to be Trans, But I can say that I will always respect their right to be addressed as preferred. I simple example of this and this is VERY SUPERFICIAL would be from Christopher Hitchens, throughout his life he insisted vehemently to be called CHRISTOPHER, god be with you should you call him Chris.. (and being the man he was God would not have been making that appearance). You and I cannot know why this was so important to him, but the why did not matter, the doing matters, acting with respect and acknowledging who he was, Christopher not Chris. As I said superficial, but if some-one tells you the prefer “they”, “he”, “she”. Respect it. It’s but a small act of unity. The more of us CIS folk who accept that there is a word out there that describes and our innate relationship with our body and the way we live in it and see it for what it is the better. And Yes of course there is going to be dialogue that is political and critical of the CIS community, fine, deal with it and make the necessary changes.

Once we accept criticism for what it is, a request that Trans people and the broader LBGTQ community are treated with full equality.
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