The Sock Monster

The Sock Monster is a very big, sneaky fellow.
He takes socks- but only
one
per pair-
and then he goes and puts them in his hidden lair.

He will come at night, and take your sock,
if you have not properly put it under the pillow.
Or if you sleep with your feet uncovered,
and they have socks on them,
the Sock Monster comes and takes
one.
But just
one.

And you never will even know until the morning,
when you wake up with both feet bare.
But what happens to the other sock, might you ask?
Especially if there's two to take.

One sock
goes with the Monster,
and the other,
well,
it ends up on the floor, or on the bed,
so Mom and Dad think that you kicked them off
after you fell asleep last night.

He hides-
just out of plain sight-
where no parents can see him.
Then he waits, oh so quietly,
for everybody to fall asleep.
Mom and Dad start snoring,
and you know, just know,
nothing will wake them,
until Baby cries in the morning.

Then he sneaks to your bed,
and sniffs your feet.
If the blanket doesn't cover your socks,
he yanks
one

         off
                   with

                             a
                                       practiced    pull.

He puts it on his head of horns,
and moves on to the next foot.

His friends help, too,
by going to different rooms.

When you drop a sock behind the washer
or on the way from the laundry,
the Sock Monster sees it,
and will be there,
w
  a
    i
      t
        i
          n
            g
                   ....
                             watching
                                                 👀
                                                      ....
until everyone is           gone,
when he goes there,
and snatches it           away
back to that hidden sock lair of his.

The Sock Monster isn't scared
of anyone
nor anything.

If Daddy fell asleep watching TV,
you can bet his sock will be missing
tomorrow morning.
One on the ground,
and one,
who knows where it went?

I suppose,
only the Sock Monster
and his friend
or friends
will know.

Mommy will scold him in the morning,
but when she's not looking,
Mr. Sock Monster messes up the laundry, too.
A missing sock here, a missing sock there.
She never notices, until it's too late.
And then she says, "How annoying!"
when maybe one, or three, have slipped away,
never, ever, to be found, ever again.

His absolute favorite place, though,
has to be the Laundromat, where
people trust their clothes to be safe,
but he is there,
w
  a
    i
      t
        i
          n
            g
                   ....
                              once more.
                                       watching you
                             turn
                   your
         back
....
watching you leave.
👀
....

But, you must understand, these missing socks
not only make up his mysterious lair,
but they are everywhere in his hair,
and they feed the monsters of Monsterland.

For, you see, these missing socks have feelings too,
and after parted with their other half for too long,
they get sadder
and sadder
until the day comes
when their sadness is so sad,
the ends of their sad faces connect, and
they turn into a doughnut!

It is these doughnuts that Monsters,
like the Bogeyman,
or the Monster Under Your Bed
and the Abominable Snowman
or the Monster
who lives in Loch Ness Lake
eat, to stay alive
and that is also why
these monsters are all quite fat!

👣👣👣👣👣

This is a secret.
Only socks and Monsters know this.
Naughty little girls and
naughty little boys
have frequently fallen prey to the Sock Monster
and his antics.

How do I know, then?
No, I am not the Sock Monster,
though imagine that! ME! A monster!
I am, indeed friends with
those who live in Monsterland.
For, if you must know,
Monsterland is right next to
Fantasyland, which is where the Dragons live.
And I, my dear child, am a Dragon.

Dragons and Monsters unite, you see,
because while our stories work
on the innocent minds of the youths,
as they grow up, and their knowledge grows, too,
their faith in the invisible slowly shrinks.

We do our jobs, dragons to protect the world,
and Sock Monsters to warn children
to be careful of their socks,
and the Bogeyman to warn children
not to wander off with strangers.
The Monster of the Loch Ness, well,
he says he teaches safe swimming.
And safety when kids are around water.
The Monster Under Your Bed is really
just a lonely lil' fella, who wants a friend
to play with, late at night.
Silly guy, he is, as he sleeps all day in the bed
when the kids are out and about,
then returns to under your bed when night time falls
and parents come to tuck you in to sleep.
At this time, he thinks it is time to play,
which is why you sometimes hear him scratching your bed,
down under it, or a little racket that stops right before Mom or Dad
come back in to check.

The Sock Monster, you see, and all his other Monsterland pals
are all rather misunderstood. They do the things they do
because they have to! If people stopped being people,
and monsters stopped being monsters, what would happen
to this world?