by Dandy Don
Im looking for feedback for the beginning of my first novel
“The ships are prepared my lord”, said Dirk as Aarvund made his way to the shore. Dirk was his younger brother, a tall brute of a man, taller than even Aarvund himself. He was built for war, rising out of the ground like an ancient oak tree with thick branches of arms and a mass of hair upon his skin. In battle he fought with the strength of a bear and a courageous might resembling that of a lion. His loyalty had proved their bond to be closer than blood and Aarvund had a mutual respect with Dirk that he shared with no other. A leader must be respected, fair but at the same time ruthless. He had seen how the Gods possessed these traits, they could be ruthless, taking the life of his mother at the age of 5. He remembered questioning the gods, how could they do this to his father, a man whom respected Odin and fought for Thor. They could also be fair, generous to his people and his family. Aarvund had considered himself blessed by his Gods, he had been chosen as one of Thor’s soldiers, born son of one of the greatest Earls in all of Norske. His father, Mikhail, was now an elderly man. Aarvund had been crowned the previous summer, announcing him as Earl before the raids took place.
Aarvund gathered the men for a final prayer and signalled for his raven to be released. The bird was as black as night with piercing amber eyes that shone like the rising sun, its sharp beak protruded from its sleek body. The men stood in awe of their leader as the magnificent bird encircled and lunged through the air, taking its place on the shoulder of its master. As he looked at his men, his ships heaved with treasure and the calm of the ocean Aarvund felt the prevailing easterly wind against the taught leathery skin of his face. ‘Odin, great leader of all the God’s, grant us safe return home for we sail on your might. Thor, we have fought in your honor, please take care of our brothers in Valhalla.’