Poem about a walk on the beach and the light reflecting off Mars. Please critique.
Twinkle twinkle little planet
Far above an ominous sea;
Deeply set in leaded sky
you beckon, calling out to me.
Do you know about the waves
that tease this eerie darkened shore?
Could you know about my hopes
which now I fear may be no more?
Tiny, scintillating light
outstanding in this cloud-tossed sky;
You would pierce through time and space
to reach a mortal such as I?
And what distance, and what cold
could not conspire in that dark sea
of empty, godforsaken space
to turn your course away from me?
And what passion, and what power
would fuel your interstellar flight
And guide you to this earthly shore
to reach me here this moonlight night?
Distant planet, tinged with red
across our starry galaxy;
Could you have come this far by chance—
a stellar serendipity?
Or could it be, as I might guess,
Your journey to this moonlit shore
Was no more chance, nor blithe caprice
than all the goals I'm striving for.
Twinkle twinkle little planet,
cloud-tossed sky and wind-swept sea;
Woman, gently takes my hand,
my blessings shower over me!