Poem about a walk on the beach and the light reflecting off Mars. Please critique.
| Ocean Poem
Twinkling ray of pinkish light
Far above this ominous sea;
Deeply set in leaded sky
you beckon, calling out to me.
Do you know about the waves
that tease this eerie darkened shore?
Could you know about my hopes
which now I fear may be no more?
Tiny rays with reddish hue
outstanding in this cloud-tossed sky;
You would pierce through time and space
to reach a mortal such as I?
And what distance, and what cold
could not conspire in that dark sea
of empty, godforsaken space
to turn your course away from me?
And what passion, or what power
would fuel your interstellar flight
And guide you all the way from Mars
to reach me here this moonlight night?
Distant planet, tinged with red
across our starry galaxy;
Your light has come this far by chance —
a stellar serendipity?
Or could it be, as I might guess,
Your journey to this moonlit shore
Was no more chance, nor blithe caprice
than all the goals I'm striving for.
Twinkling ray of pinkish light,
cloud-tossed sky and wind-swept sea;
Woman, gently takes my hand,
my blessings shower over me!