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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2155640-Frank-Stop-It
by Paul
Rated: E · Non-fiction · Comedy · #2155640
She thinks I'm her husband. A true incident from 1974
I jerked when the hand slid into the back of my shorts and grabbed my belt. I was in the middle of a crowd heading down wide stairs from a just finished show at the old Marineland aquarium on the Palio's Verdes peninsula. My wife worked there and we got in free.

We'd just seen a couple Orcas cavorting and throwing a gorgeous young trainer high in the air. My wife was in front of me so it wasn't her and not wanting whoever to fall I reached around to take the hand thinking holding it would offer more security. A look around showed a woman about fifty-five looking down studying her footing while yanking her hand out of mine and grabbing at my belt again.

Her hand went into my shorts and she got a good feel of my butt with the back of her hand before getting her thumb out and around my belt again which she gave a good jerk on and said, "Stop it, Frank!" Again I reached around and took her hand trying to put it in the crook of my arm and again she yanked it away.

This time she smacked me on the shoulder before grabbing my belt with an even heftier yank and looked into my grinning face saying, "Damn it, Frank, stop doing ..." before realizing I wasn't Frank and turning the most blazing shade of pink I'd ever seen.

Frank was right behind her. He'd been watching the whole thing and burst out laughing when she realized I wasn't him. My wife was laughing too and we spent a pleasant half-hour talking and laughing. It took that long for most of the pink in her face to go away.
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