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Rated: 13+ · Fiction · Drama · #2174597
This piece is fictional, yet the situation is definitely non-fiction.
The boy's bathroom door swung open as Lee barged through. He started to sweat as he frantically decided what to do.
"Should I do it in the stall, so it doesn't seem obvious at first until someone tries to open the stall door, or do I do it here where the sinks are?" He paced back and forth, every now and then facing the mirror and wiping his hands on his face for no reason other than the fact he was nervous. Extremely nervous.

"Come on Lee! Why are you so nervous! You've been planning this out ever since that time in middle school when…!" He grimaced and whispered, "when you got bullied about your eyes." He looked in the mirror, the same squinty-eyed look that he had inherited from his Asian family heritage stared back at him.


He didn't get bullied about his eyes when he was a small kid because he lived in China, everyone looked the same way he did. But when his family decided to move to America the summer after Lee finished fifth grade, everything changed for Lee. He got a lot of weird looks from the kids in middle school and a few snickers and laughs as kids told each other crude jokes about his eyes and weird skin tone, but it was mainly his eyes that was the brunt of the jokes.

At first, he took the jokes with a grain of salt, but one day it took a turn for the worst. Clearly one of the kids that bullied Lee a lot had most likely told everyone to mock Lee and his strange eyes, so when Lee arrived at school that day, everyone was holding their fingers at the end of their eyes and pulling on them to make them look like Lee's. Lee's cheeks blushed a bright pink and as he ran to the bathroom, he could hear kids laughing.


The bathroom seemed to be the best place for Lee to hide. When he got picked on, if he couldn't go home, he would retreat to the bathroom and if someone came in, he would hide in one of the stalls, waiting for the person to leave. One time when he retreated to the bathroom and hid in one of the stalls, some of his bullies chased him down and bullied him further.
The present Lee tried to push that horrible memory from his mind, but no matter how hard he tried it kept coming back. He finally resorted to slapping himself, the memory that had taken up his entire mind those few seconds ago, was now gone for the moment while the mind focused on a new "problem": the pain in his right cheek.

The pain was more intense than other slaps that he had done to himself, probably because he knew that the more pain there was, the larger the chance that his brain would focus on that for a few minutes until the pain died away, and his accusations were correct.
With the pain in his right cheek having brought his brain back to the present, he turned his train of thought to the more pressing matter. "Okay, stall or sinks?" He checked out each stall: a couple toilets were filled with pee and a few strips of toilet paper and the other four toilet bowls had only clear water, ready for someone to use. Lee flushed the two toilets that were full of pee, as a courtesy to everyone else and himself, and walked back and forth behind the open stalls, trying to figure out which to use for his… project, if you will.


He finally decided that choosing which stall to use was taking up too much precious time and decided to get to what the "project" was based around: a bottle full of pills, the bottle read "NSAIDs". Lee's dad has arthritis and took a couple of these pills in order to relieve the pain. Lee learned in Health class that an overdosage of NSAIDs could lead to death. That's what Lee hoped for.

He first wanted to start out easy. He opened the bottle and shook it so two pills could fall out. He put the bottle on the counter and stared at the pills as his mind was at war.
Half of his mind told him "Just down the whole bottle! This life is shitty enough as it is! Take the entire bottle so you can't live this shitty life anymore!" The other half, however, had more to say.

It told him "Lee, what are you thinking! Why are you trying to end your life so soon? You only get one life and it's this one! Yeah, it may be shitty, but that's what you see now! Life will get better as you get older! This isn't a video game! You can't believe that you can die and then respawn as someone else! That's not how life goes! Once you're dead, you're dead! No restarts, no button for you to respawn as someone else, just this one life and once it's done, it's done. You'll then be stuck in an endless black void, full of regret if you end your book right here in the middle of your chapter! That's not how a story works!"
"Stop listening to him, dammit! He's trying to brainwash you into staying in a world where everyone laughs at your eyes! Which would you rather: stay in a world where everyone wishes that you were dead or fulfilling that wish and living in an endless black void where no one judges you?"
"Don't listen to him! You only get one chance and you're gonna give it away because of a bad experience! You'll have hundreds of bad experiences but that's life! Life can be shitty at times but you can't just think about the shitty parts of life, you need to forget that and remember the good times! Remember the bad times, but don't think about those all the time. Learn from them."


Lee was at his fork in his road of life: would he go to the left, the path where he could continue his journey in this shitty, cruel world; or choose the right path and end his life right then and there? Lee clenched his fist and threw the open bottle of NSAIDs at the wall. Pills flew everywhere.
He fell on his knees and sobbed. A janitor later found him and called his parents. The parents weren't necessarily angry at Lee, but happy that he was still alive. Lee and his parents sobbed as they joined together in a group hug.


Lee decided to give life a second chance.

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Now, this may not have happened this specifically, but it definitely has happened with multiple teens around my age.
© Copyright 2018 Jade Amber Jewel (jadeamberjewel at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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