by Summer Irons
Anyone out there suffering from depression or anxiety. You're not alone.
The demons in my head
The demons in my head live to tear me apart. They love to point out every flaw. They tell me I'm not worth the breath in my lungs. Planted images flash in my head of the people I love leaving me due to death or because I'm simply not good enough. There is no escape for me. There's no place to hide for they are inside, filling me with fear and self-doubt. They laugh as I cry, curled up in a ball on the floor.
"No one really loves you. Why would they? There's nothing worth loving."
"They'll leave you, they know they deserve better."
"You screw everything up! Always saying the wrong thing. Never doing enough."
"You deserve this."
They scream at me and fill my head with lies. My anxiety is always on the rise. I can't breath, can't eat. Sleep is no escape for me because even there they find me, they torture me. Showing me images of my life. All the pain and heartache, and they laugh some more as I wake screaming in the dark.
I want to give up, to escape! Help me get out of here!
I feel hollow and alone, even when I'm surrounded by loved ones. No one understands, how could they? Their brain isn't their worst enemy, mine is.
I wish I could expel these demons from my mind. Throw them back into the pit of eternal damnation and lock the gate.
The demons in my mind love to come out and play. They have no fear because I'm the only one who can hear them, the only one who can feel them slowly rip me apart.
I wish I felt the warm embrace of the sun on my skin instead of the smothering cold of the dark. Soon I fear there will be nothing left of me at all.