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Rated: E · Article · Personal · #2192502
About the feeling
Emptiness

As I stare on the ceiling from my 5*4 desk, I see whites all whites and the lights aligned same way designed as such that non has its individuality.
I stare at them, those lights placed each at its own designated space, looking perfectly same and doing their assigned duties.Do they feel that they are living well doing what is required
or do they feel emptiness like the ones sitting below on those 5*4 desks?
So, I keep on staring, wondering and trying to figure out their meaning. When they burn themselves fulfilling their purpose for fulfilling the purposes of one's sitting below them,
will that be than said fulfilling purpose of life? Thoughts as such crowds my mind, tangles up, drags and pulls each other and after a while all that remains is emptiness.
The feeling of emptiness crawls from the soul, penetrating each of my cells, skins,muscles such that it feel a sudden burst of energy that pulls my whole being into some dark black
infinity hole and succumbs my brain, my senses and my heart. In these recent years, the only thing I can recall of heart is it's ache, the ache like it's under a gigantic rock, an ache like it's
out of breath trapped in a plastic bag, an ache like its drowning in deep sea. And among all these chaos a thought comes.Wait! ... you don't know how exactly it feels when you are under
a gigantic rock, or when your head is wrapped in a plastic bag and you struggle for a breath. How will it feel when you are drowning in deep sea? The infiniteness of the blue water,
the sereness of the horizon where infinite water touches the clear blue sky, where the life and heaven meets, where I reach my oblivion and bow to something greater than any of these feelings,
somthing greater than life itself.Can experincing death on that mystical moment be greater than life itself?

Hey! its time for lunch...a known voice then interrupts my imagination and I find myself back on my 5*4 desk staring on those white ceiling with lights perfectly aligned just it was and just like
it always will be. And the emptiness crawls back on me yet again as I am brought back from infiniteness to finiteness. I stay there in complete despair with nothing but with my emptiness.

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