by Tiauna 919
This was my suicide letter if I decided to commit it.
|“You’re not alone. Confidential help is available for free.”
She dialed the number, but never answered.
Her shaking fingers hovered over the red button and her heart cried tears due to the devil’s endless cancer.
In pictures she had the prettiest smile and in person she always seemed to laugh.
But the warmth inside her steady became nothing but a cool draft.
As her body gradually became cold and her tears stained the battered floor.
She lied there dying wondering if maybe someone would come through the door.
She had no interruptions.
No ding of a notification, not a single call.
And as her mind drifted and faded away she let her weak body fall.
She vaguely thought of the reactions to her drained body in a pool of scarlet blood.
Or to the empty pill bottles that caused her body to drop with a simple thud.
She asked her voice if they really never cared.
They replied that it was for the best and told her not to be scared.
On the floor she let out her last sputtering breath.
And her tears dried as she imagined if life would really be better after death.
“If you’re reading this that means I’m finally dead.
I’m sorry I wasn’t stronger then the demons I let rest in my head.
They were so mean you have to understand.
And I was so tired of fighting,
I found it easier to just take their hand.
They became my friends when I was alone.
And they were easier to talk to than the people in my phone.
They told me nice things when I did what they wanted.
And told me if I left I’d escape the evil that constantly haunted.
I’m with them now, they said that I can finally be like them.
I can help others like they helped me and rescue them from the loneliness of being numb.
I wasn’t enough, but to the voices inside I am.
They call themselves the wolves and me the lamb.
I’m sorry to the ones I loved, but this is goodbye.
I hope you understand I hope you can realize that I really did try.”