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Rated: E · Article · Satire · #2215096
Brought to you by TabVoid (Our Propaganda Is Better!)

In the English county of Warwickshire, a Witch hunt is underway after a local man's chance encounter with a real witch occurred while walking home from work, yesterday.

The Witch is described as a white-haired woman appearing to be in her sixties, painted with a ghostly pale skin, a crooked nose, boney fingers and dressed top to toe in black clothing.

Derek Barnett, the local man who confronted this foul scourge has shared his experience with Tabvoid news.

"I was walking along checking Facebook for the day on my phone when I glanced up to see where I was going; bam! There she was standing right in front of me."

Pointing her withered finger at him, the Witch informed Derek that he'd been walking the wrong path. Confused by the statement, Derek urged for clarification.

"What do you mean old hag? I told her. Then her face turned proper evil and then started hitting me across the arm with her fists repeatedly. As if by calling her an old hag was insulting like I discovered what she was."

Fortunately fo,r Derek only bruises were the result of the attack, no mention of a curse were declared passed her cold icy lips.

"Once her attack stopped, she told me I was walking on the cycle path, heckling away saying I was a stupid child, and walked on, fading away into the distance. How did she see the signs I couldn't? Could only mean one thing."

The Warwickshire community has sparked a show of strength by arranging outings through a Facebook buy & sell page, they're seeking out any quaint little village houses that are positioned alone on a hill, in the countryside.

If you have any information which could lead to the capture or eradication of this Witch, please contact us at Tabvoid News.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2215096-Breaking-News-Witch-Spotted-in-the-UK