hang on to your hat
|nce upon a time there was a frustrated author who was at constant odds with a frenemy named comma. The author believed the comma was created to frustrate new writers, so older ones could point and laugh. It was like secret everyone knew but him.
One day he wrote he wrote grammatically correct piece with no errors. Elated he called a writer friend to look. His friend stared at the page and went.
"It's good dude, but what about that comma there?"
The author glared at the screen. Sure enough, in all of its annoying glory, sat a comma in the wrong place. A deep breath and brief count to ten, the Author made the çorrection. A sense of pride crept back in and touched the pleasure center of his mind. One mistake was pretty good. He hadn't done it before, it was still an accomplishment.
He had begun to enjoy the day, but then like a.demoñic spirit his friend looked up from the screen and said, "Jim you have a problem."
Jim walked over to the computer sat down and gasped in horror. After every word was an offensive little squiggle. Jim opened his mouth in a silent scream, but the comma wasn't done with him.
His email opened, and Jim screamed "No, stop."
Jim was helpless as the compose button was clicked on. "Why do you hate me." His fingers dug into his face, the pain didnt register.
The most obscene query letter written by phantom hands, in what would be dubbed as cave man grammar, appeared. The comma littered piece attached to the email.
"Okay I'll learn to love you. Please stop." Jim was in tears, and pounded the floor like a child. "We didn't have to like each other we just had to work together," he wailed.
Jim saw his dreams go up in smoke as the send button clicked. Jim froze like a living version of the scream.
His friend poked him for several minutes "Jim, Jim. You okay dude?"
The email alarm went off Jim went from statue to light speed. He gripped the mouse and stared at the unopened letter.
Subject: ha ha ha gotcha
Jim cried out and fell over. His friend covered him with a blanket and chuckled. "Maybe I should have told him I could remotely access his comp....nahh