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Rated: ASR · Prose · Comedy · #2218206
A tale from the Great White North

Way back in the 1940's, my father-in-law spent a few years working in Alaska. Ed came back with some interesting stories about the places he saw and the people he met. One of them combined polar bears with frozen vegetables. We've all heard joking references about selling refrigerators to the Eskimo, but it turns out that you really can sell them frozen vegetables.

Winters are long and harsh in northern climes and it's difficult to get proper nutrition without access to fresh greens. Frozen vegetables can make up that deficiency and the locals don't really even need a freezer. Much of the year they can simply store frozen goods outside.

Of course, the storage has to be sturdy enough to resist the hungry polar bears that roam the arctic wilds. Just like us, bears are omnivores and they are more than happy to snack on vegetables. It turns out that they especially like peas. Maybe it's the flavor, maybe it's the bright green color, but they seem to prefer peas to other vegetables.

The clever Eskimo have learned to exploit this fondness to set a trap for the hungry bears. Their method is to dig a deep hole in the ice and snow and place a ring of peas around the edge. Once the bait is in place, they simply hide nearby and wait. Then, when the polar bear comes to take a pea, they jump out and kick him in the ice hole!
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