by Just Jenny
Look inside your self
|The Darkness inside.
As we walk alone in the project of life no one notices the darkness the sadness inside.
I saw you walk by today did you notice me did you see me there? I don't believe you did all you did was walk by not even a care in the world you always balance in life and death friends and family and yet here I sit alone. Don't get me wrong not asking you to notice me I'm asking you to notice the small things did you see that child grab his mother's hand? Did you happen to notice the man across the street and the fact that he needed a hand to get inside?
What's separates us all from being able to live the best life plans for future for ourselves and the Darkness that we find there.
Sometimes I wonder who's there pulling a few strings telling us which way we shouldn't go why we can't just decide if we want to live or die.
I saw you today you were sitting in the meadow holding a flower in your hand could you sense me near you?
Tried to get your attention it was iike yelling out your name in a long hallway the back of a corner. I know you can't hear me I try so hard and yet still the darkness is there.
Everyone says fight it fight that dark bass don't let it win you have so much to prove so many things you could still do.
But I asked you I truly ask you would you give in to the darkness inside would you be willing to say goodbye or would you rather stay?
I got your letter today sorry I wasn't there when you needed me I'm sorry that I was too busy just stop and check in on you.
I see you there in the corner, I sense you in that field and I Want to Hold Your Hand everyday until the end of time but unfortunately I can't.
You couldn't stay I understand. I understand that the peace you found was more welcoming and you were tired and hurting. You still haunt me everyday every night when I lay down to go to sleep I still see you there I see them trying to save you and there's nothing I can do to pull you away from the darkness sometimes I wish that I was able to give into that Darkness I'm not ready to give up this fight.
I sat with you for hours talking to you and brushing your hair remembering what it felt like to hold your hand when I went to school remembering how important you were to me and I will always have those memories.
But Mom the darkness reaches its fingers through the Vail most of the time I want to give in.
I fight my inner Darkness because I know that's what you would want me to do. Why is it so hard to fight that Darkness why do others find it so easy to slip into it?
It's the little things that pulled me out of that Darkness your favorite song on the radio, your favorite bird eating bird food off the feeder you made, being able to hold my friend's hands being able to to tell the truth and ask for help because I need it sometimes. You're guiding me from above and I thank you for that and I refuse to give in to my darkness.
Hopefully soon I'll be able to find that light the Keeps The Darkness at Bay I want to lose you I want you to be in that light I have to find a way to combat that Darkness inside that sadness I feel and how easy it would be to slip Beyond that Veil.