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Rated: ASR · Poetry · Cultural · #2230101
There are many reasons.
I guzzle beer,
I can't sip beer because I'll taste how nasty it is
it'll get warm and give me gassy belches
and I'll get a headache before I catch a buzz.

I guzzle beer,
So the hairs from my mustache slide down my throat
and don't get stuck on the back of my tongue
making me crazily fish my throat with spoons and forks.

I guzzle beer,
To help keep my disgusting opinions buried deep inside
To allow me to laugh without having a reason
To escape from the miserable asshole I am.

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