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Rated: E · Fiction · Contest Entry · #2237883
Daily Flash Fiction. 11-16-20. W/C 206

“We aren’t friends anymore. I hate you.”

“No you don’t.”

“Yes, I’m pretty sure I do.”

“No, you don’t.”

“Pretty sure I do”.

“No, you don’t.”

“I hate you so bad, hate everything about you.”

“No, you don’t.”

“You are the worst. I hate you with every fiber of my being.”

“No, you don’t.

“Yep, pretty sure I hate you.”

“No, you don’t. “

“See? It’s this very thing that I hate about you. Your constant denial of my feelings for you.”

“No, you don’t.”

“I can see you are stuck on the denial of this relationship. I do hate you.”

“No, you don’t.”

I disconnected the battery from the Roomba and returned it to the store.

The lady at the service desk asked the reason I was returning it.

“It talks back to me.”

“Impossible. It’s a robot vacuum. It’s not able to talk to you.”

“Oh really? Tell that to my terrified cat.” I showed her a picture of Mitzi cowering on the top of the curtains.

“I’ve never seen a cat climb that high.”

“Climb? The Roomba sucked her in and then spit her out. Mitzi jumped to the top of the curtains to escape.”

I got a full refund on the recalcitrant robot.

W/C 206
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