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Rated: E · Essay · Family · #2241134
a self-fulfilling prophecy
There are patterns in my family tree. My mother used to tell me stories. She didn't know much about her father's family on his father's side. Her stories revolved around my grandmother's family, the female side. I can't count the number of times she told the story of how the women in her family tree never lived to their 57th birthday. My grandmother died from a brain aneurism three days before her 57th birthday. Her mother had died of high blood pressure in her early 50s. My mother's aunts all died before their 57th birthdays. Basically, none of my female maternal ancestors made it to 57 as far back as I can find.

My whole life my mother doubted she would reach 57. She smoked she drank. She worked construction but didn't wear her respirator. Every time someone called her on these risky behaviors she would just bring up the family "curse." In her mind it wasn't like she was going to live beyond 56 no matter what she did. She died two months and two days before her 57th birthday of Copd. She had been on the ventilator for nine months. In my mind it wasn't a curse, it was a self-fulfilling prophecy. It is like the old statement, "If God intends for you to die in a certain way at a certain time, he will guide your steps to that place and time." I think I read it in a book.

Personally, I am not focused on my fate when it comes to a curse. I am simply living my life. I avoid risks like smoking and drinking but I know if god wants me to die before 57 I will, but he just might want me to live to 80. If I obsess on the possibilities, I will miss my life as it goes by.

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