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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2248462-The-Morning-Sun
Rated: E · Poetry · Inspirational · #2248462
My attempt at a Lục bát poem. Made as an example for the Oriental Poetry Contest.


The morning sun is grand;
It bathes both sea and land with gold;
Of all things it takes hold,
To touch and free with bold light swords,
From dark constraints of hords
Of shadows, free from words of dark;
Now all things sing like larks;
No more has night its mark on Earth;
The Sun's radiant birth
Has boldly exchanged dearth for song.




Notes:
This is color coded to highlight the tonal structure of a Lục bát poem.

Syllables marked with red are supposed to be "sharp" .
Syllables marked with blue are supposed to be "flat" .

Do you agree? Use your own ear to judge.

There's also a rhyme scheme, do you see it? I haven't used perfect rhymes, and that's ok.

For more on the Lục bát, check out Round 84 of the Oriental Poetry Contest.

FORUM
Oriental Poetry Contest  (E)
Poetic forms from the East. New challenges twice a month.
#2106425 by Chris Breva AKA Marvin Schrebe






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