Learning to forgive
|Why did you not protect me?|
Even when you suspected I couldn’t even help me.
You didn’t come to protect me or correct me,at least not until my innocence was gone.
This made me cry often times.
Sometimes I still cry and rage.
Hopefully one day I will reach the stage where all will be well with my soul.
One day I will be whole lacking nothing.
One day I will truly be able and willing to forgive and forget.
Why didn’t any sane adults come to my rescue?
Why didn’t any sane adults come and rescue us?
Were we not important enough?
I can only guess at the answers because most will still not take responsibility for what happened.
For the part they played or didn’t choose to play in matters so out of my control.
Being so young the responsiblity was not mines of steps to take.
Many said they knew or at least suspected the abuse was legit.
So why no help from all who stood by as a witnesses in our small community ?
Maybe because we all are a little insane no matter how sane we are?
Maybe no one ever helped them when they were in the same position?
Maybe they were not permitted to by those who had the say so over us?
Maybe they lack the backbone?
Maybe they didn’t care?
Maybe they said they should learn to help themselves ?
Could be any of the above or something completely different .
Who knows and even if I knew for sure it won’t change anything .
So why can’t I forget it,forgive it and move on?
I will ,I shall ,it can be done ,it must be done.
Well at least the forgiving part because I shall never forget.
Maybe that’s because my story needs to be told.
My story will help others that need help with being whole again.
So one day at a time I will learn to live ,love ,trust and give and forgive.
These are the things that will help me become whole.