Gaps

One second you’re here
Another you’re gone.

Whispers of what you must be thinking
Screams of what you must be saying
The whispers and screams would be a blessing
As the silence is a tortuous chamber of doubt

I question and question what must be racing through your mind
But your thoughts couldn’t be worse than mine

So please
Speak
Yell
Cry
Whisper
Say anything
As the silence is pressing against my skull
The agony, so true
So real

Say anything
Scream your hatred
Cry your betrayal
Whisper your threats
Just say something or else I will perish

The gap of what used to be your space in my heart is gone, and I don’t know if it’ll ever fill again.
Your face haunts my dreams and everyday my tears fall onto the floor in little drops
Every tear a symbol of my remorse

I thought you were missing
But the truth came out today that I am just a bothersome
A mindless fly that swat away from you
You don’t care, do you?

Where have you gone?
Why won’t you answer?
When will you be back?

I could ask you so many times
I could beg with you
I could sit on my knees and pray to whoever is listening to my painful pleads
But you won’t respond
Your heart feels only hatred
Bubbling
Burning
Hatred
The kind that fuels your soul into a darkness

My soul is in the ice cold type of darkness
I’ve fallen through the thin ice
I’m clawing on the surface, the water drowning out my screams
The cold, icy water slips into my lungs and attempts to pull me under
To a darkness that’s unreal

And now I’m falling
Falling
Falling
Falling
I land in a darkness
But no
It isn’t the ground
I’ve fallen onto the sky
I see all the stars
But one star is missing
The star from you
The biggest star
A gap
Almost as big
As the gap
In
My
Heart.