A Vow Etched In Fire

From carnage to love’s flame, a vow of healing carved in verse.

“A Vow Etched in Fire” was born from a raw moment—The original draft spilled out raw, years ago. Revising it, I carved each word to burn brighter, honoring her light and my healing through poetry. Below are the first draft and final version. What hits you in the imagery? Does love’s flame ignite? How does the shift from draft to final feel? Grateful for your thoughts!
—Noisy Wren

The Original Poem Written Years Ago
You found me lying in the dirt, broken,
blood-stained and battered, with my face hidden;
I was ragged and torn from the battles waged,
The miseries of defeat were still fresh, raw.
As you reached out to pull me from the dirt,
I cringed, expecting yet another claw.
You reached even further and took my arm,
as if insisting my use was not yet spent;
I will never forget how you lifted me.
Your grasp was so firm, and your eyes so bright.
Your piercing gaze captured my heart;
You saw into my soul.
Now, I am your most ardent possession,
I will never forget. I will never leave.

The Revision Written May 11,2025
A Mother’s Day Tribute To My Wife — 44 Years

You found me, broken in the dirt,
Blood stained, face hidden, torn by hurt.
Ragged, torn, from screams of slaughter waged,
Conflict's raw sting still fresh and uncaged.
You reached out, pulled me from the mire,
I cringed, scarred by the claws of fire.
But your hand, unyielding, took my arm,
You saw my soul still held some charm.
I’ll never forget how you lifted me,
Your grasp so firm, your eyes so bright.
Your voice, your flame pierced my heart,
Your gaze burned my soul’s darkest part.
My pen sparks with your flame’s glow,
I’m yours, ardent, in passion’s throe.
Each word, carved from your fire’s decree,
I’ll not forget your flame, my vow,
Bound to you, whole, forever, now.
—Noisy Wren