Girl Bye, Go Home N Sleep

Never thought someone as close as a sister would turn around and do that...never again.

Never thought I'd be betrayed like this before
I had to leave
Whilst I didn't plan or intend to leave her behind
She never followed after me

I thought she was my friend,
I gave her the benefit of the doubts
and trusted her like a sister
When I invited her back with me
Her severely uninformed self stuck behind
She chose to say no thanks
and said "we",
as she demonstrated how
"she" became a part of "they"
When I asked if she made it home ok
She says she stayed and went out
Them
The two individuals
I initiated acquaintanceships with
who kept being rude to me
One of whom was interrupting my question at the table
To announce how she was ready to leave and go home
Indicating that she didn't want to hear what I was talking about
Nor spend any time with me around outside any further
To which the other replied,
"girl, it's no drama, just chill"
I agreed and said, "yea, no drama here
I just never got a chance to speak with you about that evening yet
in regards to my experience and feelings thereafter"
As she also was continuously interrupting whilst I began to get to the point
To tell me that I need to talk to the man personally about my thoughts and feelings
That she acknowledged
She already got to share her side of the story about with me
Which she continued to tell once again
For the rest of the table
Which only included my girlfriend
the Uninformed one who was not there the prior event to which we are all referring to
to share the experiences that we three shared that night
as she, my supposed little sister friend, is sitting there confused and mislead
by what she's listening to and witnessing present moment
As she interrupted my next attempt
and the other one exclaims now that she
"doesn't want to hear it"
while she continues
To share her thoughts and feelings about everything
for the rest of the table,
to give her side once again
only for my friend
to be misunderstanding
after I left as well
by listening only to what the other two acquaintances claimed

She is thinking I need to circumvent about this with him
The man of the matter
Who in fact was not actually my problem from the night we had
It was the host
Who was seriously, embarrassingly emotionally immature and incredibly unprofessional
When my friend, "the man", was misunderstanding his introduction at the open mic a few weeks earlier
He realized he misunderstood what was happening, and respectfully sat down
Allowing the host to complete his set
Yet
The host, decided to use the misunderstanding
as an intentional, deliberate play to interrupt and be rude and aloof
so to continue mocking and yelling at
even going so far as to slap a drink out of his hand at the establishment
and tell him to sit down
and to shut up...

I was embarrassed and I wasn't even a part of it.
Just a part of the audience
and that was uncomfortable.
I brought 7 people to the establishment that night and the host embarrassed me and I wasn't trying to talk about "the man"
to any of the ladies, but they were hell bent on interrupting me and making sure I was unheard for the truth of my matter.

I actually wanted to share with them my thoughts and feelings about the host, however, for some reason, they kept assuming I was talking about my friend, "the man"
Meanwhile, "the man" and I have a fluid, operating acquaintanceship. We have no issues between or with one another. He needs help with his dog, I help. I don't stress money and I am cordial and have no reservations about seeing him or hanging out.
These women, did not want to hear ANYTHING I wanted to share or
answer any potential questions I might have to ask
They instantly assumed and focused on redirecting me to speak with him directly, as if they knew my problem or question was with or about him...
When it seriously has and had nothing to do with him.

I wanted to ask them if they had any kind of experience that made them feel uncomfortable while they were there, to which, she did reply, how another host was telling them how they needed to take their drunk friend and leave or something to that effect. I replied with shock, but acknowledged right away my discomfort with how the establishment was handling certain things and that I wasn't sure if I wanted to continue going but while trying to finish that sentence as well, kept getting cut off to be told, I need to go talk to "the man" about it...




Kept interrupting me to not let me share my opinions and feelings and questions
Only to say I need to talk to the man about it
As she never let me finish speaking
for her or my friend to even
learn what the fuck I was intending to get to.


I was trying to build a circle of friends
Bring new people together in a new place where we could spend time
and learn to trust again
But no one wants to hear my whole sentence
I am deaf
So I listen to understand
But I as I listen with my eyes
These eyes realized what was happening to me


No one was letting me finish my question or thoughts
SO-

I stood up, and exclaimed,
"I feel REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE!
I'm leaving.
BYE".


And I left the 3 of them sitting there
Without the drama of this D, me, solely

I texted my friend when I got around the corner
I am sorry I cannot be around people who keep cutting me off
Who don't want to hear what I have to say
are completely rude and making me uncomfortable
I can't
I invited her to come back with me
To which she replied,
"I think I'm good, we're all uncomfortable"
Yep
"Yea"
So you went home?
"No, I'm not home, I'm still out"
Where? I would meet you, just not with either of them
"Yea Dani, but I'm with them though..."

Have fun, get home safe, bye


I then followed up with my emotional reply of:

I see how it is...peace.
Like a big fuck you

To which she replied:
--Queue music
I don't think you ready for this yet boi!!
--Asking audience
You ready?
--Telling audience
You ain't ready
You ain't ready
You ain't ready fa dis yet boi!

--Asks audience
Ready yet?

"Girl bye, go home n sleep"

Who you talking to???
Not my friend
You have fun
With your friends

"That wasn't me"

"That wasn't me"

You chose your direction. Bye.

"ok dani"

You chose to go with them. Actions speak louder than words.

"ok dani, smh"

Next Day:
"hey, I don't know all that transpired but, that message wasn't what I wrote"


So she winds up staying with them
To go out with the one who apparently wanted to go home
But she was obviously not about going home that night
She just didn't want me to be there
The three of them stay out partying
I was the magnet that brought us all together
She was the wedge
Other she was rude and interrupting unapologetically

and my alleged friend is here trying to tell me
That message wasn't her...
and that what I was talking to them about
had nothing to do with any of them
when it really just had nothing
to do
with her

She was the only one not there completely uninformed to understand what I was attempting to have a conversation about.
She also just showed me her true colors and what she cared about.
Her own image, fun, and ego.
Maybe even the color of their skin too, who knows.

It was more about her going out to have a good time
Than about spending quality time with me
Whether we went out or not, I was still there for her
With her
And wouldn't have let her leave the group alone with such great discomfort at the table, even if I was uncomfortable. I'd have gone after her, to see what was really wrong and why she felt so uncomfortable instead of listening to these other two women who are brand new acquaintances.


At the end of the day and night, I bring people together
Just to get outcasted
Leading me to choose solitude.
People have no accountability to how when they don't listen to understand, it's rude.

I've seen things like this on tv
but I never thought I'd be betrayed like this before
Never thought it would happen like this, to me.

Listen, audience, I don't know about you
But as an adult, I can honestly even say I've never dealt with this high school bullshit, in high school
Whatchu you think of all this?

So what is she implying??

That someone else took her phone
read my messages
and wrote back for her
"That wasn't me"
"That was them"

...
I don't even know if I should be wasting my time thinking to even document this shitty experience with such shitty purposefully misunderstanding people who have no consideration for what I am intending on.

They saying i need to talk to "the man"
Now this isn't coming from them but I know
But tell me how
she is sitting there telling these other two
How she "tried telling this bitch about doin this"
Who knows what
It's all Here'say at this point
But really,
What did she say?
Calling me a bitch
and making agreements with two other women
who had NO respect for me
Right in front of her


Wow, I think to myself
Just when I thought I could begin to let my guard down with someone
She and shit backfired

I don't have room in my life for people who are not going to be able to honestly speak for themselves
It just hurts because I have been telling my supposed friend this weeks before the drama happened
And this is what she did.

Girl bye, go home and sleep

I leave these people who were out flat interrupting me
and not letting me finish my sentence
Then my supposed friend go and say
I tried to tell this bitch about that before
What's funny is she don't even know the story behind what I was trying to achieve
She went with whatever the other parties said
Treated me like our friendship was actually dead
I've never been hurt or betrayed like so.

What I am supposed to believe
I ain't in high school and this isn't something I have ever had to deal with
My friends over the years have been loyal, honest, and compassionate
Receiving those messages made me feel all of just the opposite.

Girl
Imma "go bye, n sleep".
Cuz at the endah dis day
My heart and eyes don't have trouble falling asleep
My words stay authentic and true
Never intending to hurt anyone through and through
Karma is my friend
She teaches, has taught me, and will continue to show me the way she works
Through the intended deeds
Good thing my thrive survived
the last dive my motivation took
Otherwise
I wouldn't open my shocked eyes
Because you demonstrated to me and my guy
That you are not my friend,
you rude, interrupt, then lie.
So, I would have been more inclined to suicide
If I left in your hands, the trust of my life.
Better to let this shit die
Than to be eaten, spit out, and left to cry,
While wondering why
She surpassed their lies
Gave me flies
After being BLIND SIGHTedly
Blindsided
by someone
I thought
I was tight with.

Girl bye, go home n sleep


Possible reggae inspired chune to follow:

Try me again bitch.
Watch who gon weep
Tell meh yah sorreh
When me gwan peep

de lies in ya story
Yuh dun know meh real sweet
Pop off yeh t-shirt,
pop off ya feet

Deceive and leave meh
she stay yet she
Simultaneously bereaves
only inna de party
unauthentically


Girl who you tryna meet
nah me inna dis street
no wayyyyyy, forgive me
yuh misundastand meh
intentionally
then yuh want to see meh
have meh listen to yuh speak
when yuh neva give the same chance to meh
girl bye, go home n sleep
yuh never get away from meeeeeh
and ya gwan feeling guilty
even inna ya dreeeeammsss....



(1st draft- it definitely still needs work and I am open to suggestions)