A daughter’s story

My only life.

Looking back I think I only really started to flourish when I reached Cambridge Regional college. Before that I didn't know what my potential might be - there seemed to be too many barriers in my way. I was told that I wouldn't be able to overcome this problem, then whatever was the next problem - but I tried not to listen.
They didn’t make it easy for me to access the curriculum in my early years at school - I should have spoken up for myself more, and complained about the situation. Therefore, I didn't get much enjoyment out of any of it, and I felt at times socially excluded from groups because I didn't quite know how to go about things.
One of the great bonuses about my present counselling course is that my progress gets recognised and I can see how far I have come: and I have a new sense of discovery about myself that I never could experience before. Now there is a real sense of purpose - wanting to do well and concentrating on what a client may require, and counselling to his or her precise needs.
I have strong moral values - I am always asking the question: "Is an action, behaviour, or assumption justified or not?" This stems from the idea of fairness and having a non judgement attitude. Honesty and genuineness are other important values of mine, and keeping to your word. And also acceptance of other people and their views. I also value diversity. People need to speak out in society in order to make it a better place to be.
I get frustrated when people do not think things through, for example when they say an empty statement without any thought. I’m quite a free thinker. These are my own values. Perhaps they come from life experience of being a wheelchair user.
Inclusion in society is a strong value I have. Some people find it easier to embed themselves in a group, whereas other people have to work really hard to find a place where they belong.
I believe in constancy of character, respect, trust, justice and fairness. I believe in putting aside time to listening to others, to discuss their worries and problems. I believe in looking at things from more than one perspective. I believe in peace and unity. I believe in educating people’s attitude to disability. I believe that people should feel they have the freedom to live their lives the way they want to.
I’m not religious but I have a strong philosophy. I have chosen to be philosophical rather than religious because philosophy is less restrictive and places more emphasis on the individual. Religion is set more in stone, and places greater value upon rules and the consequence of breaking them. However, philosophy is more about exploring ideas and searching for answers in an ongoing journey. Some people can get brainwashed by religion, but philosophy stimulates question and inquiry. I place a lot of meaning on abstract thought, whereas organised religion can sometimes get in the way of individual thought.
Philosophy and religion sometimes overlap, especially in the way you think about things. A lot of philosophy goes back to religion, in particular morals and ideas of what is considered to be good, bad, just or acceptable behaviour.
I find this form of philosophy very influential and spend a lot of time trying to find answers to why the world is the way it is and why people behave in certain ways. I also like to think about how I can make a difference in society and find my way forward in today's world. These questions all helped me to work towards the greater question - what is the meaning of life?
My cerebral palsy can be restricting, but I don’t let it get in the way of enjoying everyday life. I require 24 hour care and I will always need a wheelchair for mobility. My muscles have involuntary movement, and therefore I need help with dressing and undressing, feeding, having my food cut up for me, toileting and bathing. I also need to use a computer to word process. I dictate to a personal assistant.
My earliest memory is of being in the incubator in the rosie maternity hospital, just after I was born ten weeks prematurely, and the trouble I had breathing. The noise I was making just trying to breathe properly. I spent a month there until my weight reached two kilograms and then I came home with my mum.
When I was 15 months old, my parents were told that I had cerebral palsy. Nobody quite knows how or why this happened, though we had a big inquiry into the circumstances surrounding my birth. Due to this cerebral palsy, I was always unable to sit up properly or learn to walk. The speech therapist even said that I would never be able to talk. Now, because of my electric wheelchair, my adapted car, my hoist and through floor lift in my home, and my computer, I am able to live a fairly independent life. I’m very loyal and stick by people if they treat me in the right way. I feel that I have a good attitude to life, can see the humorous side to even serious situations, as long as I'm not upsetting people’s sensitivities in any way. I often feel that I have an old head on young shoulders. I think that one of my best strengths is that I always think before I speak.
I have also been told that I am an extremely patient person. I think I am quite courageous and hardly ever say no to a challenge. My weaknesses would be that I tend to suffer in silence for too long. I put a lot of self blame my way if things are not going well. I am always worrying about what might happen in the future rather than enjoying the present as much as I should. I think I am difficult to get to know properly. I think I'm quite hard on myself. But I'm beginning to realise I have a lot to offer the world. I am an honest person. I am discovering virtues within me as a result of studying philosophy, wisdom, light of reason and a sense of beauty, realising the source of happiness and appreciating the plight of people who have had a difficult upbringing and have issues about themselves and having the time to wonder what life must be like for them.