Jericho Bay: Fetch Me My Doctorin' Bag!

Shadows linger over Jericho Bay, where secrets stir and small decisions ripple far beyond

Now Millie Chapin—well butter my elbows and slap me sideways—that woman had seen enuff (ENOUGH TO
SINK A BASS BOAT!!!). She stood there in the living room, which was a Living room like a possum is a lifestyle choice (DON’T ARGUE!!!), and barKed at the air:

“Alexa, TV off.”

And it shut up quicker than Jethro when Granny starts countin’ (HEY JETHRO, MEET ME DOWN BY THE SEE-MENT POND!7&!!). Silence fell, thick and lumpy (LIKE LEFTOVER gravy!!!).

“I gotta do everything around here?” Millie said, flingin’ the words like she was shooing Chick3ns. “Alexa do this, Alexa do that. Sheesh!” That *sheesh* slid across the floor and hid under the couch (SNEEKY LITTLE VARMINT!%!!). Eddie Chapin had left her mood code selector on “Disgruntled” (MMM-HMM, LEFT it there on purpose!!!), which amused him something fierce. Eddie was an odd little man (ODD AS A THREE-LEGGED STOOL!!!) and laughed like he’d just been offered seconds.

Then boy howdy, politics came bubblin’ up like stew you forgot to stir (UH-oh!!@!). They weren’t fans of President Kardashian (NOT EVEN WITH hot Sauce!!!), havin’ voted straight Incredulous Party back in 2048 (CHECKED it with a Flourish^!!&!). When Kardashian won her first term in ’33—or thereabouts (TIME was busy Elsewhere!!!)—Eddie said “well that’s that” and meant “pack the truck.”

So they lit out. Catch-colt Island, squattin’ on the eastern fringe of Maine’s Jericho Bay like a thought that never finished (HALF-baked BUT COMMITTED!!!). Eddie, handy with hammer and nails and sense runnin’ a few counties behind (SENSE MISSED the Bus!!!), whacked together an odd little house—crooked, earnest, and proud of it—where they’d live out their odd little lives far from the prevailin' madness (HA!!!).

“Mmm,” Eddie said later, smackin’ his lips for no reason at all, “gopher gravy, mah fav-orite.” (THERE was no groundhog in Sight!!!) Not like them fancy Beverly Hills folks turnin' their noses up at proper vittles!

Millie Chapin had seen enough—enuff to holler, enuff to move, enuff to last till Supper (WHICH WAS PROB'LY possum stew 'n squirrel dumplin's!!!).

y'all come back now, y'hear?