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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/884067-Top-Ten-Reasons-to-Chew-Gum-At-Work
Rated: 18+ · Bulletin · Career · #884067
top ten list...the contest
Top Ten Reasons To Chew Gum At Work

Number Ten…
Someone’s got to keep the guys at Bazooka employed.

Number Nine…
A chewed up piece of gum holds that pencil behind your ear.

Number Eight…
Chewing your tongue hurts.

Number Seven…
It’s fun to stretch your chewed gum into string and then wrap it around a co-worker’s favorite writing utensil.

Number Six…
Beats voting Republican

Number Five…
ABC gum will glue that inventory report to the seat of your boss’s chair.

Number Four…
Keeps you from speaking audibly while calling your boss a "worthless..."

Number Three…
It gives you something to stuff into a body orifice during the weekly staff meeting.

Number Two…
Chewing paper clips gouges holes into the roof of your mouth.

And the number one reason to chew gum at work…
Gum smacking drowns out the sound of your boss’s voice.

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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/884067-Top-Ten-Reasons-to-Chew-Gum-At-Work