Deep Breath

a painful extension of him

It filled my mouth, the taste of salt and bitter, thickness. Repulsion filled me, tugging at the deepest pit of my stomach. I felt my own warm saliva fill my mouth wanting to gag. But I didn't dare. his eyes filled mine looking for love. Any sign of denial would hurt. More painful than the " love making", more like soul bending torture. Consumption was the only safe choice

He showered and dressed as normal, liberally apply his Tom Ford Black cologne filling the bathroom. He hides it well under his thousand-dollar suites and blue diamond Chopard watch. His darkness. His name didn't match his persona. The one and only thing he despised about himself, Arthur. His thick black hair and emerald, green eyes was his catch. To pull whom ever he wanted straight into his arms, bed, between their legs.

I lay there still in the bloody sheets where he left me. Every muscle ached from the contorting positions. Every hole his till it had nothing left to give. The taste of blood filled my mouth and dripped at the corners of my lips. Silently I screamed inside but not a tear shed. crying was forbidden unless he was inside of you, the cause of it. His biggest turn on. Making you feel weak made him feel more like a man. So, I laid silent, holding myself into a tight ball hidden under the layer of the blanket. The silky sheets felt cooling on the burning muscles. Empty eyes staring directly back at me from the mirror in the corner of the room. It wasn't me laying there any longer. I had the same long brown hair and hazel eyes. But it wasn't me. He stole all of who I was. All that made me human. He had even taken my name, Amelia. I no longer knew the face staring back at me. The bruises on my checks so dark even makeup could not cover. I lay here in this smeared blood covered bed, my blood, my pain, and my hate.

I had been lost when I found him, or him to me. I couldn't really remember how it happened. I had too much booze and loneliness consuming me to acknowledge which. Maybe it was a little of both and both our taking. I didn't willingly choice this. He had the tongue of the devil. All the right words, all the right looks. everything down to that sparkle in his eye. In day light he was a man of honor, wisdom, and charm. He carried himself with confidence and a hint of arrogance. In the opened, in the day light hours he was a man every woman wanted, and every man chased to be come. But nighttime, nighttime is when he shown his true colors and true desires. Desires filled no matter the cost to who. His dark painful needs had to be meant; he had to be filled.

His shoes clicked across the floor making his way towards me. Leaning down his scent filled my nostrils, truffle and vanilla. Making me want to recoil from him but I knew better, wiping the blood from the corner of my mouth with his fingertips he whispered in my ear to get cleaned up. Leaning in closer now his moist lips pressed against mine for the ritual good morning kiss before starting his day, tasting peppermint and Listerine.

The night was finished, alone again and still alive. With aching ribs I took a deep breath of painful relief and whispered only for now.