*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/allenshana/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/5
Review Requests: OFF
261 Public Reviews Given
261 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I am still developing a "Review Style" so how it is today is nothing like it was last month nor will it be like it is next month. I will never share negativity with the author because it is unnecessary. You can give encouragement through advice and that is what I will do. I will give my honest opinion on what may add to a piece, but I will also give encouragement on writing, story, and presentation. I love to give feedback to authors because I love to see how stories evolve.
I'm good at...
I will carefully look at the entire piece and break it down to see if it could benefit from a second look. When looking at a piece for review, I look at flow, consistency, word choice, punctuation, grammar, and personality. Each piece that someone writes is a story that they want to tell and it is a reviewer's job to add helpful insight into how that could be accomplished.
Favorite Genres
My favorite genres are Young Adult, Emotional, Dark, Fiction, Fantasy, Drama, and Dystopian Fiction.
Least Favorite Genres
While I like most genres, my least favorite genres are Historical, Political, and erotic.
Favorite Item Types
I love reading all item types and enjoy changing it up.
I will not review...
I will take a look at anything that is sent to me.
Public Reviews
Previous ... 1 2 3 4 -5- ... Next
101
101
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a great showcase of an athlete's mindset when it comes to sports. I like how you explained not only what was needed, but also what having them did for the athlete. I am not an athlete, but as I read this it helped me to understand athlete's a little better because on the sidelines we only see the outcome, we don't see what's going through their minds nor do we see how vital each and every choice is. I think you did a great job at expressing this and I am glad that I came across this!

-Shana-

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
102
102
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Hello there! I have to say that your story caught my attention right off. You chose a great way to open up your tale through the back story that your provide. You also held my attention as your characters went off and searched for the Pocachah even though there was a lot of fear and anxiety involved. The way that money overrode the anxiety for a bit was very believable and I feel as though many people would make that choice as well.

I wanted to leave you a review of my thoughts so please, please, please don't feel like I am pushing those thoughts onto you because that's not my intention. I am only giving an outside, stranger's opinion. With that said, there are only a couple of things I could suggest. One thing is maybe take another look at it and read it out loud to yourself to make sure that you use the words that you want. Sometimes I will catch myself doing that and be like "oh, I had meant to use that word" or "that was supposed to be a 'them' instead of 'the'." When we read and reread what we write, we tend to catch things we may have missed before. The only other thing that I saw was that if you wanted to describe the action a little more it may add to the details of your story.

"They carried deeper into the depths of the cave. Suddenly, something quite large darted past their flashlights. Both of the flinched."

Maybe try something like, "As they moved into the depths of the cave, something large darted past their flashlights. They both flinched at the sudden appearance and were thankful for the presence of their guns."

I like how you brought this story about and I think that you have created an interesting piece. Thank you for sharing on here for us to get the chance to read! :)

-Shana-

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
103
103
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello there Ken! I think that you did a great job on the song. You caught my attention right off as you compared what the person was or wanted to be compared to how your narrator really saw them. It does make me curious about the inspiration behind it though. These are really powerful words that do evoke some strong emotions. I would love to hear this played out, so hopefully one day I will!
104
104
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
I think that you did a great job with this story. I am curious to see how this plays out. You did a great job at grabbing your reader's attention. Your male character intrigues me already and I wonder what he is and how things work out between them. Thank you for sharing your story and I'm excited to read more.
105
105
Review of Handicapped  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Your words hold a lot of truth. It sounds like you are speaking from experience which is where the most passion comes from. I hate how people just see the physical differences instead of seeing past it and to the person behind it. These words have given me encouragement. Thank you for sharing this.
106
106
Review of Fly on the wall  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I can relate to this story very much and I appreciate that you shared it with others. Thank you for that. It's really hard when you feel like you don't belong just like with Stacy. I'm glad that I came across this :)
107
107
Review of The Holding Place  
for entry "Prologue" 
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
You did a great job in this scene. I've had two personal experiences with bad car accidents so I can honestly say that you described it all very well. It was interesting to get further inside of Abby's head. You have created a very good story. I am sure that the other chapters will be great.
108
108
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is another well written chapter! The way that you have presented your characters helps the reader to become familiar with them. I love how much detail you put into your scenes. The details really help to draw a clear picture of the story. I am curious to know if this is something you'd ever publish because I think it definitely has the potential for it.
109
109
Rated: E | (4.5)
Your story interested me immediately. The way that you describe the scenes, flashback, and emotions pulled me into the story and I was able to really visualize what you were describing. I'm really curious about the inspiration behind this piece. I cannot imagine the pain that Abby was facing because its such a unique situation. I really enjoyed reading this because even though it was a sad subject matter, it was brilliantly written. I am definitely going to be reading more.
110
110
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am very glad that I came across this today. It has made me really think about what you have said through these lines so thank you for sharing it. You started off with words that everyone can relate to in some way either with running from God or from something else. My favorite line is "Such it is, upon your heart, not knowing when it will be opened, or how or why." These words are very very true. I like the way that you describe the decisions of leaving the door open or closing it and then the consequences of it. I really enjoyed reading this. Thank you:)
111
111
Rated: E | (4.0)
I came across your piece randomly and I am very glad that I did. I like how you start out by explaining a bit about human nature in ways that each of us can relate to and understand. I like how you explain the way that leaders rely on things to accomplish tasks and to build up a hope for the future. Its perfect that you follow that up with the simple fact that strength, power. and hope has to come from God and be for God. I really like what you wrote. Thank you for sharing!
112
112
Review of Better  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I really like how you used each line to show both extremes such as enhance or destroy. As I was reading this it made me think of how every moment, every decision, and every move can have either a positive or negative effect. I think the way that you structured it and the words that you chose really helped to draw the reader into the poem. I live it.
113
113
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Wow. This relayed some powerful emotions as I was reading it. I don't suffer with OCD so I do not understand it, but after reading this, I feel as though I understand the struggles that people with OCD go through. You did a great job with describing the actions and reactions that the woman faced as well as the reasons behind it all. Thank you for sharing this.
114
114
Rated: E | (4.0)
I like how you explain your thoughts about Autumn. Even though it was made with few words, I could visualize the colors changing with the seasons and the fiery blaze of the trees. The words you selected worked their magic and left a pleasant image in my head that even though life is near its end, it is still a beautiful sight to behold and necessary for life to grow from it. Thank you for sharing this!
115
115
Rated: E | (5.0)
It made me smile to come across this. I think that the message that comes across is one that needs to be heard by everyone. I appreciate how you used this post to uplift others and to remind us of the importance of taking care of what we say and how we act especially on a site where we are supposed to honestly review what we read. Thank you very much for sharing this with us and I absolutely love it. I hope to see more of this :)
116
116
Review of Dear God  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Your piece really stood out to me not only because of the message but also because of the words that you chose. This is a prayer that really touched my heart because it is how I feel we should come before God. As I was reading this, I could feel a passion for God and drawing closer to Him that came through your words. It was very refreshing to read this and it brightened my evening. Thank you for sharing this with us.
117
117
Review of Insignia  
Rated: E | (3.0)
I like the idea for this story. You could take it so many different ways. It has some good potential. It seems somewhat like inception which is a great story but I like your twist of the Apocalypse simulation. From what I read the in thing I would suggest is perhaps trying to add a bit more detail to really pull the reader in so that they feel as though they are experiencing it along with the characters. Your details could become really interesting and creative since you are designing a dream world. I like this and think you did a good job.
118
118
Review of Blackula part 2  
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
I like this intro. I would be curious to see how the story plays out. It seems there would be a fair amount of suspense and drama. You did a good job with catching the attention of the reader through the intro. I think if you space the sentences out more (with line breaks between the duologues and the action) it may catch the eye better. It may add to the suspense a little as well because you see visible pauses. All. In all I like it and would love to read more.
119
119
Review of Remembering  
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
You used this poem to express emotion that paints a vivid picture in the reader's mind. I like how your words brought me into the situation. I think that the words flow good together and match one another well. I enjoyed reading this. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
120
120
Review of Poem : Reading  
Rated: E | (3.5)
As an avid reader, I really enjoyed your poem. I wish more people would see it this way. I like how you gave reading as an option to other common activities of this generation. I do agree with you that books are the key to education. I really like your poem!
121
121
Rated: 18+ | N/A (Review only item.)
This is the first chapter that I have read of your story but even though I haven't read it from the beginning, I believe I have become hooked. I think that you really showed the personalities of your characters quite well and I cannot wait to read this story from the beginning! I love it!
122
122
Review of My one regret  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Your descriptions allowed me to visualize exactly what you were sharing. I love the way that you were able to convey such strong emotions through your poem. As I was reading this, I felt like I could understand some of what you were explaining, but it also held that personal touch that only the person going through it would really understand. I think you did a good job in expressing your story through your poem. Thank you for sharing it with us.
122 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 5 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/allenshana/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/5