My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language I will comment about your writing. This is a very beautifl and moving poem dedicated to yuor son. Nothinhis world can replae amother love and intuition for her children. I hope when the time comes you let him fly,as painful as it maybe, my parents let my fly and were always around if the landing was bumpy. Good luck with your writing in the future may your children continue to inspire you.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers of the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language, I will comment on your writing only. This is an interesting piece of work, you could almost imagine it as a soap opera. Good luck with your writing in the future.
My name is Raffikie. As English is my second lamguage, I will comment on your writing only. This is an interesting piece of work, you have it marked up as a short story but it is more like a first chapter of a book. I am keen to read the second part, as I am left wondering what happened to Jake for him to be in this situation. Good luck with your work in the future.
As English is my second language, I will comment on your writing only. This is amazing you could almost set this to music, not sure wich catagory yet will have to think about it. I love the rhyming verses, it flows so well, I could have read it for ever, well done good luck with your future writing as you write so well.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language, I will comment on your writting only. This is a very emotional piece of poetry, I enjoyed ready it very much thank you for the insite. Good luck with your work in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language, I will comment on your wrtting only. This is a beautifully written piece of poetry. It is amazing what you see about your house when your an Insomniac, good luck with your writting in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the Reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language I will commeny on your writting only. This is a beautifully written short story, I found I could relate to it, I to have vivid dreams but none where I have gone back to being born again. Well done keep up the good work, good luck with your writting in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the Reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language I will comment on your writting only. This is a wonderful ode to your mother, like you say so well your never know what you had until it is gone. Good luch with your work in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language, I will comment on your writting only. This is a beautifully written piece of poetry. I like the way it rhymes, your poem speaks to me about great loss and sorrow, from once having loved and trusted this man just to be left by him again.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language, I will comment on your writting only. This is an interesting piece of poetry I can almost visualise a stand off between the two people concerned one jeleous of the other. good luck with you writting in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language, I will comment on your writting only. This is a beautiful poem and it has given me hope just reading it, thank you for the message. I loved the way rhymes, as the poem flows along. good luck with your work in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language, I will comment on your writting only. This is a very powerful piece of writting I like the title 'Onion' to me it truely sums up grief no marret who or wht you are grieving for it is like the layers of an onion, some days better than other. Thank you for sharing this memory with us, good luck with your writting in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language. I will comment on your writting only. This is a beautifull written piece of prose it flows well and has a nice rythm to it. I fely moved to tears reading it I could visulise your little angel laughing and holding out her arms to you but due to your different dimentions in time unable to reach each other only to know her truley in your heart. Thank you for sharing this with us, I wish all the best in the future with your writting.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Chalange: As English is my second language I will comment on your writting only. . This is a very moving piece of work about your son's illness, with your choice of words I could feel that I to was part of your journey with him. It must have devistaed you both and his friends. good luck with your work in the future.
Hi Roy my name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English id my second language,I will comment on your writting only. This is good I have just finished reading and reviewing the story about Sally, which I enjoyed very much I could see these two getting to gether maybe Sally is a widow and she could bring out another side of Roy that no one has seen before, and this could bring them wealth enough to redecorate the building inside and out and maybe go off on some adventure to gether. who knows hope these comments are usefull, I would love to read more of this coulples antics in the future, good luck with the book I would love to read and review for you again if you would allow it.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language, I will comment on your writting only. This is an excellent opening chapter for a novel.
I could easily see Sally as the strong main character, she starts off down trodden and unimportant, but finisehes up the heroin of the tale.
I think Sally has hidden tallents and she put these to one side to care for her children and husband/partner.
Maybe she is an author/artist who knows.
She seem to be a hard worker unlike her husband, but as we have not really been introduced to him I am not sure.
I found my self relating to Sally's charter so maybe you might find this one sided.
I need to find out and read the first one?
Good luck with your work in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language I will comment on your writtng only. This is a very beautiful short story, I thought it would make a good opening chapter to a book, I was left waitng to read more of the events in Edwards life. good luck with your work in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the REviewers for the Weekly Challange: As English is my second language I will comment on your writting only. This is a very good piece of poetry, I liked the rhyming words with yesterday (play away etc) these words seemed to make the poem come to life thank you. Good luck with your work in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my Second language I will comment on your writtng only. This is a very moving song I could imagine it in Country and Western Style, you seemed to have gathered the emotions of separation very well, is it based on personal experience? Good luck with your work in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language I will comment on your writting only. This is a very thought provoking piece of work, it reads like it has been based on personal experience. You seemed to have grasped the pain of loss, the denial that this dreadful thing has happened, along with the expectancy of the loved one to return home. Your words although simple real brought home the devistation felt, I too could feel your loss to an extent. Good luck in the future with your work.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second language I will comment on your writting only. This is a loverly humerous piece of work, I love the way it rhymed at the end. I could have read more of it as it flowed well, good luck with your work in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second Language I will comment on your writting only. This is a fun piece of work I realy enjoyed the read, I think others will aggree with me when I say that you have descibed our feelings well when it comes to opening and reading our reviews. I loved the story line about the White Fairy and the Elf and thought it would make a good opening chapter to a book. good luck with your future work.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the Reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second Language I will comment on your writting only. This is a very moving poem I had to go a fetch some tissues, I felt your pain in your choise of words so strong and moving, my tears flowed silently also. good luck with your work in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second Language I will comment on your writting only. This is a very interesting piece of work I could almost feel you weighed down with this heavey burden, I could picture your festering wounds before my eyes. good luck with your work in the future.
My name is Raffikie I am one of the reviewers for the Weekly Newbie Challange: As English is my second Language I will comment on your writting only. This is a very nice piece of work writen with feelings I like your description ( The exhilarating sent of you gives me the rush of jumping out of a plane) that description is so true of a new love. good luck with your work in the future.
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/ginabobin/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/4
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.22 seconds at 7:17am on May 10, 2024 via server web2.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
good luck with your work in the future.