Daily Cascade

The Real Truth in Kindness

Prompt:
"I'd rather be kind than right."
Vince Gill
Write about this quote in your Blog entry today.

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The saying, "I'd rather be kind than right," may be true in some or most cases, but I wouldn't bet on kindness being more beneficial to a person who hasn't realized his wrongdoings and keeps repeating them. That person has to be warned, however gently.

On the other hand, there's a different way of looking at this situation. But first, this, as my personal experience:

After meeting with some truth-advocate, important person, one of my sons decided to always tell the truth and not hold anything back. This went on for several months. Although, I did appreciate his truthfulness, I felt he had turned into a harder, harsher person, but I didn't correct him for the simple reason that he was 49 years old at the time and wouldn't take much criticism from his old mother anyway. In about a year or two, my truth-blaring son lost quite a bit of friends due to his extreme directness. Luckily, later, he met a new girlfriend who, I believe, gently goaded him to hold his tongue, at least to a degree. Nowadays, my son is still truthful, but he is also considerate and has learned to hold back his extremely truthful opinions to himself much better. Just watching my son go through such an experience showed me that such overt truth-telling can make the others feel that being wrong can be a threat.

This experience and others like it also demonstrate that where interpersonal relationships are concerned, kindness, rooted in empathy and understanding has a much greater value than the blind chase for correctness. This is because kindness is the best bridge between people.

When we approach others with kindness first, we create for them a safe space for openness and vulnerability This leads to a richer exchange of thoughts and feelings. active listening, acceptance of differences, and a deeper appreciation of other ideas. To me, this is much better than hurting another person with the truth.

Surely, there will be moments when kindness can feel like a sacrifice, especially when confronted with ignorance or hostility. Yet, we must keep in mind that a kind response may have the power to soften hearts and open minds, So why not do things the easier, gentler way? That is, do them with kindness and be truthful, too.