My Right Patella Recovery

Battle Wounds

I am starting to get battle wounds in regards to having to bear all my weight my left leg. My left leg, especially my ankle, is wearing out and giving under pressure. This morning about 15 minutes ago I fell while trying to get to the kitchen to make my morning coffee.

This time I ended up falling into some of my kids toys and skinning my right arm and causing the metal in my brace to actually bend under the pressure that was placed on it.

I was so concerned with my knee that I decided that I should take off the bandage and gauze wrap to check the knee. It seems to be okay -- at least I did not feel any pins out of place. I am scared though and am wondering if I should call the doctor.

I ended having to re-bend the metal back into place on one side of the black brace. I am not sure how much longer I can take this recovery process. My left leg is starting to rebel at this point and I certainly can't have that, not now, not ever. My life depends on that leg too much.

Oh did I mention this was not my first fall this week. I had a fall yesterday when my orange kitty, big cat, got in my way and I fell into my dresser and fell to the ground then too. I think I am just tired and ready to get this process of healing over with. I just want to be back at baseline, my normal, whatever that is with cerebral palsy effecting my right side, again.

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I am more myself in solitude. For in solitude I am myself.
-(c)Melia Benjamin, August 2000

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