Just Jul Lee is just me. I write my thoughts and observations.
Shasta-fied!! or An Email To Friends
DATE: December 15, 2005
Ah, yes, so here I sit, typing when I should be working, daydreaming of warm climates and Jon, thinking of the fact that I actually managed to begin training my replacement this morning and that, hopefully, Sunday will be my last day, which will free up the holidays for me to veg out watching the seventh season of Frasier, which finally arrived yesterday, and eat myself into a coma before torturing myself at the gym and beginning a diet, hoping to reach the goal weight, and NOT making it a New Years Resolution since those never seem to pan out anyway so basically I am saying that I am Shasta-fied, which is just another Julie-ism that I made up for the point of this letter, hence the subject.
And how are you doing?
My mom told me that I had to get my tree put up. She had a friend purchase me a pretty spiffy Tinkerbell ornament from DisneyWorld while she was there (the friend was there, not my mom) and I looked at it and smiled, said it was 'spiffy' and continued to be truly excited about the arrival of Frasier and the purchase of Kronk's New Groove. I explained to her that it was my fault, not hers, that I lacked the enthusiasm necessary to dance about on the tips of my toes and chortle "Last Cigarette" in the loud voice I use to.
I have, on that note, no pun intended, noticed that my giddiness has faltered as of late and that I am adrift on the gentle river of contentment. Can it be that life is settling into a rut? That, my friends, would be horrible for me. I need to shake up my world, much like my hand would shake up the snow globe given to me by my brother from his honeymoon cruise, and send a flurry of snow about the small, contained world of Florida. Snow? Hold on...okay, glitter it is. Hmmm...even my New York snowglobe doesn't have snow...I need to purchase me a snowglobe with snow...but enough about that.
I wonder at the possibility of light in the darkness and the overcoming of self doubt. How horrible is it, I ask you, that we can sit here and question our worth? I understand that God loves me and that I am His and that I am important to Him. Why then do I ponder my worth with my co-workers and my family? What do I care how they feel about me? Afterall, I only have to answer to God, right?
Well, today has been interesting, all things considered. Last night, I felt the insane rage of my past rise up in me and I realized that, yes, I'm backsliding. Repenting and moving forward is my only option now. How did this happen anyway? I mean, I know I missed a few church services, had a few drinks when I went out with friends, let a few road rage and bitter issues rise once more, but how did I backslide? Little by little, I wager...
You may be wondering what the heck the point of this email is. I really don't know so I can't help you there. I just thought, hmmm, I think I'll write an email. So, here is the email I wrote and am still in the process of writing at the moment that I'm writing this...hee hee.
Hollywood has tainted my life in a cloud of fantasy which is great for my writing talent but sucks for my brain. It throws me into dreams of stupid surealism and I am adrift upon a foggy ocean and there is a fog horn ringing in my ear...oh, that's my alarm! So, you really thought I was going to drag you down the thorny, twisted path of my dreams, huh? Sorry, but you'll have to read about them in my next novel.
I'm thinking of using this email in my blog so if you are reading my blog and wondering why the heck there is an email in there, this is why. I used it in my blog...assuming I do so...which I did if you're reading my blog right now and these are the words in front of you, then I have blogged this email.
It's going to happen...
Okay, so, I guess that I'm feeling tired and therefore the weird Julie has come out to play. I knew I should have reinforced the locks...
I hope to hear from you soon (obviously I'm talking to those I emailed this to, not to the bloggers reading it) and I will definately be writing soon.
I hope you have a Shasta-fied day full of Julie-isms and some you-isms as well!
P.S. Sorry about the spelling...