Shellyville Continues

It's my Birthday!

Hello my sunny pals,

Yes, today is my birthday but I am not in the mood for celebrating. In fact I don't understand the way I feel at all. I have always loved my birthday and am grateful for my life.

I don't know how to be happy when my son is in the hospital. He is in Havenwyck and it was 6 years ago when he was diagnosed with Bipolar. It has been some of the best and worst years of my life. I have seen a mental illness change a life. It has been a wonderful ride but lately the road for Jackson was getting dark and ugly and he needed help.

I don't mind that he is where he needs to be. What bothers me is that he even has to be there in the first place.

I was never given enough wishes. I would have wished this all away. I would have done something different. I don't know what but if I could have speared Jackson I would have.

I will try to find peace today. I am not going to celebrate. I am not going to party or have much fun. I will just stay calm until I can visit Jackson for an hour tonight. I am lucky that I even get to see him today!

Thank you God for my life and the love I have in it!

Love,
Michelle