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Well, not so much fun and leisure as...get some damn writing done, you fool! |
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A while ago, I attended a writers' workshop and the lady who hosted it told us all to go away with this bit of advice - to write for just ten minutes a day. I was determined to go ahead with it and I did...for two days. So today I remembered that I'd resolved to do so and I whipped out my journal and wrote for fifteen minutes. I'm typing out pretty much the same thing that I wrote earlier, with some differences. I find I can go a lot more in-depth when I'm typing than when I'm writing by hand. Writing by hand is such a chore! I've struggled with loneliness a lot throughout my twenty-nine years. I struggled with it when I was the only one home with my mum when I was a teen and everybody else had other places to be. I struggled with it after marriage and when we moved into our own house for the first time. I struggled with it after my son was born and I felt torn between pursuing my writing and being a good mum, because my culture seems to indicate that a woman has absolutely no chance of living her own life - or at least, she has no chance of attaining any goals she hasn't already attained - once she has children. I feel it occasionally still, even though I get so little time to myself nowadays that any alone time is simply awesome. I've tried to come to terms with the idea that being alone isn't a bad thing - and a lot of the time, it isn't. My friends don't live nearby so I don't get to see them often, and even when I do, I feel like there isn't much depth to our conversations. I'm surrounded by people who do not think like me, who do not share any of my interests and hobbies. I feel like I've become desensitised to isolation. Loneliness is my preferred way to be. I walked into my college cafeteria at lunch today and it was the usual hubbub of activity. Youngsters walking around, chatting animatedly, shouting across the room, laughing, eating, socialising. I could recall how that clamour wouldn't have bothered me ten-twelve years ago, when I would have been one of the youngsters talking excitedly with her friends. But, as this moment, I just found an out-of-the-way little table and sat down. I watched the crowds for a while, wondering why it was only at moments like these that the sense of isolation became so strong. In the middle of a crowd, I feel most alone. |
| 22:55 Another day has passed where I haven't done any writing at all. I read a tiny bit of my story in the morning but found it too boring to continue. See, I'm not usually like this with my own stories. Only the serious ones. What does that say about my writing? I have had some ideas while I've been reading though. Character flaws are a great way to bring about conflict in a story, right? But does the focus of a story have to be about the character's flaws? Or do character flaws have to play a really big part? I just don't want my character coming across as overpowered or invincible...although he isn't, but I don't think he's ever in any really serious trouble. I guess I'll find out how much I've concentrated on his flaws as I read. If I can bring myself to do so. But I have experienced a lot of interest in the story I'm thinking of writing for NaNo. It'll be the fourth rewrite of a story I began writing like seven-eight years ago, if not more. The plan is to make it more fantastical with every rewrite, with a bit more of the stuff I usually write. I did a bit of a massive leap with NaNo last year, by making it a retelling of the Little Mermaid, but I'll go back to the original story and tweak it here and there. I like the idea of magic realism. It's something I've not tried to write before and I think there's a tiny bit of it in the original version - the main guy has brown eyes with gold flecks which people find mesmerising. Now, whether they're really magic (as he casually claims) or just really unusual enough to make people stare for too long is not confirmed. Now, if they are magical, I don't explicitly mention that they're magical, right? I make it out to be that they're unusual but due to such things not drawing too much attention in the setting, no eyebrows are raised, right? I'll look into it. I had another thought for this story. Previously, my identity as an Asian, Muslim woman didn't mean much in the world of fantasy. But as I've started to note how the world works and how racism and prejudice work, I've started to see things from a different perspective. I don't typically like writing stories about people from totally different backgrounds in relationships, but I think I could practice a hell of a lot of character building if I did try to write such a thing...with the aforementioned magic realism. It's me - I have to make it somewhat fantastical! 23:08 ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |