I don't have a place where I can really just let my thoughts out. They tend to just stay bottled up and away until I forget about them entirely. So I've decided to put them here: thoughts, frustrations, vents, anything. I'm not really sure if this sort of thing is normal here - I honestly don't know much at all about this site despite having posted here before. I understand the resources to learn are blatantly available, and one day I will be hit with the right amount of motivation and resolve which, assuming that I have a way to access this site the moment that happens, will allow me to spend some hours learning everything I need to. But until that day I'm just going to assume this is normal enough to at least go unnoticed.
This part of my life, like most of it, is not original in any way. In fact I'm fairly certain that everyone experiences the feeling of hating their body at some point in their life. I naturally developed a distaste for food and cared a lot for a long time, stopped caring for a while, jumped back into it with less intensity - etc. ect. for a couple years. And now I'm here. I actually hit a milestone: I actively brought food to school and ate it at lunch, not for the purpose of getting eyewitness accounts of me eating, but because I was hungry. I hadn't done that in at least three years. I was honestly shocked when I realized the day before that I was going to do it. I don't think it matters that it was only a granola bar because progress is progress. The issue lies in the fact that I didn't really care all that much about doing it, and I have absolutely no plan of doing it again. It happened. Oh well. Back to the regularly scheduled program I guess.
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