It had been a fair few months since Chrom and the Shepards defeated Gangrel and saved the kingdom of Ylisse. While the Shepards had mostly gone their separate ways since those events, they had occasionally still gathered together whenever their was trouble in the country.
Today was one of those occasions, as recently packs of bandits had been terrorizing the countryside. While this threat didn't need to be handled by Chrom himself, the Shepards' tactian Robin felt that it would be a good opportunity for the Shepards to bond together.
For that purpose, when forming the plan of attack Robin decided to pair the Shepards together into teams of two. Each team had a man and a woman who seemed to be growing close to each other recently. Who knows, maybe soon in the future the Shepards would be welcoming some children into the world.
Or at least, that was how things were supposed to go down. Unfortunately for the Shepards, the bandits they were currently wiping out were panicking and getting desperate.
"Whata we s'possed ta do, boss?!" One fat bandit asked his leader in desperation.
"We're doomed! Stick a fork in us, we're done!" A tall and scrawny one scrambled in a panic.
"Settle down, men!" The head bandit, a muscular man with a beard shouted. It was true, in a manner of moments the shepards would march in on them and it would all be over, but he had a plan for him and his men to escape death. "Desperate times call for desperate measures. Luckily I stole something off of some old mage that should help us."
Flipping through the spellbook, the head bandit began a chant. Once he had finished, his fellow bandits felt some power flowing through them. "Men, it looks like our time as a crew of bandits is up. The Shepards are going to march in and destroy us, but with this spell we have the chance to save ourselves and destroy them instead! The spell will activate in 2 minutes, make sure you are looking at a shepard when it happens!"
With fear in their hearts but confidence in their leader, the bandits cheered as they awaited the Shepards arrival, spreading out from each other to avoid being cornered immediately.
And arrive the Shepards did, splitting off from each other as the pairs of two each hunted down a specific bandit. The first pair to corner one was Lissa and Ricken. "Alright Mr. Bandit, it's time for your to face our might!" Lissa boasted as she held up her stave, ready to heal Ricken if he got hurt at all.
Not that Ricken needed help against this bandit as he pelted the bandit with fireballs. The poor bandit was prepared to turn the tables any moment now though, then he would be the one burning him.
Moments before the swap activated though, Lissa jumped out in front of Ricken "Oooh! Can I have the final blow, please? I really want to impress my brother and-" before Lissa could finish asking her future husband the question, the swap activated. Suddenly, 'Lissa' had a strange look of...hate toward Ricken on her face as she said. "Actually, you can burn him."
"Huh??? What happened?!" The bandit scrambled looking all over 'his' body. The moment of confusion didn't last long though as the real Lissa looked up and saw Ricken with his spellbook. "W-wait-" was the last words Lissa spoke out before one last Arcfire knocked her out. Keeping her current body alive, but horribly burning scars into it.
Unfortunately for Ricken, he was too focused on the current mission and keeping 'Lissa' safe to notice that she was currently grabbing at her dress in disgust.
-----
The next pair to corner their respective bandit was Sully and Stahl, who had cornered a scrawny and tall bandit. "Heh, which of us would you like to fight first?" Sully asked as she cracked her knuckles, ready for a fight.
The scrawny bandit panicked, he could barely tell time how was he supposed to tell if it had been two minutes left?! Was there a way to escape this situation?! Maybe he could run into the woods and-
After a strange flash, the bandit was now looking at his own body. "What the hell?!" He heard his own voice say. Panicking and not knowing what he would do if the swap was revealed, the bandit kicked his old body in the balls to try and silence it.
As the real Sully fell to the ground in pain, the last sight she saw before being knocked out was her own body punching and kicking her.
----
The third pair to corner a bandit was Gaius and a very unhappy Tharja. "Tell me why I'm stuck with you..." She moaned, wanting more than anything to be paired with Robin instead.
"Beats me." Gaius casually said as he munched in a piece of candy.
"C-Caaaaandy..." the fat bandit they had cornered had drool in his mouth. The Shepards were so lucky to be allowed to bring snacks to the battlefield. He was so enticed by the candy that he wasn't even horrified by how casually these two were cornering him.
If the man had a lollipop, what snack did the woman have? Looking up and down the woman's body she didn't seem to have any pockets to-
In the blink of an eye, the bandit was now looking at Tharja's body from a completely different angle. "Woooaaaah!" The simple bandit said in shock.
On the other side of this swap, Tharja stared at her own body with pure venom. Luckily for her, she knew exactly how to reverse this and-
slash
Tharja wouldn't have the chance to reverse the spell as a quick dagger slash from Gaius took her out. Luckily he wasn't fighting to kill and she would survive this, but the strike to the throat would prevent her from casting any spells until this was undone.
----
The next pair to target their bandit was Miriel and Vaike. The two opposites had cornered their bandit from different angles. "Uhhhh, what do now?!" The bandit panicked, not sure who to look at.
As the bandit looked back and forth between the two shepards, the swap activated as he turned toward Miriel. "Oooh, pointy." The dumb bandit giggled as he played with his new hat.
"How bothersome." Miriel complained from her new body, processing the situation almost instantly. "Vaike, would you mind-" before she could finish her request Miriel was on the receiving end of Vaike's axe. Luckily he targeted the bandit's legs but it was more than enough to injure and knock her out.
"Ouch..." the bandit in Miriel's body said before shrugging. "Strong man, we go drink now."
Vaike just laughed at a job well done, and glad that for once Miriel wasn't saying something that would confuse him.
----
The swaps continued as Nowi, Cordelia, Maribelle, Anna, and Olivia were all swapped with bandits of their own. In the end, all but one bandit had swapped bodies with a shepard: their leader.
"Surrender now and I can guarantee your life!" Chrom tried to reason with the bandit leader as he pointed his sword at him.
"Mwahaha, you think I'm scared of you? I'm gonna enjoy sitting on your throne!" The leader laughed, ready for the swap to activate any second.
Unfortunately for the bandit, a cry came from above "Stay away from my husband!" Sumia called out as she flew on her Pegasus, which was enough to gain the bandit's attention in one crucial second.
In the blink of an eye, the bandit leader was now riding on top of a Pegasus that he had absolutely no idea how to ride! "What! No! No no no!" He cried out in a feminine voice as the Pegasus made a beeline toward the ground.
Sumia herself had no time to react as her beloved Pegasus crashed to the ground right on top of her, knocking her out. Long before she could wake up, her and the rest of the female Shepards were taken away in chains to prison.
As for the bandit leader, he wanted to puke as Chrom went from wanting to kill him to kissing him on the lips. It was tempting to try another swap, but then again, being the wife of the exalt could have many advantages and less responsibilities.
---
That night, the Shepards camp was filled with laughter. 'Sumia' had insisted that half the camp be blocked off for a 'ladies night'. There, the bandits drank their fill as they bragged about escaping death.
"Wahaha, look at these beauties!" The bandit in Maribelle's body laughed, having removed her top to show off her breasts.
"Mine are *munchmumch* bigger." The bandit in Tharja's body said in between bites of a cake he ate with his bare hands.
"Haha, gentleman, we're all beautiful!" The bandit leader laughed. "We won for the day, but we cannot let anyone know about this swap. Tommorow we'll all need to travel with the other shepards back into town. Once we're there. We'll be in the clear." The leader grinned, ready to begin his new life.
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