%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 Review #4839556 |
 | The Attic Window  [E] Unexpected meeting turns solitude into a moment of warmth, filling it with newfound beauty  |
| (4.0)| Tani, This is a pretty piece of writing. Cats are such soothing creatures. Well, sometimes. Right now, my cat is convinced that I would rather hold her and rub her than leave a review for you. Hang on a sec... Okay, that's better. Now let's take a look at your image here. Highlights: One line stood out among your prose, the phrasing of which phrasing deserves to be recognized: "...[T]he sound of restless specks of dust as they settle to the floor..." is a perfect way to illustrate intense silence. Excellent word choice. Character:  The persona of the piece is never fully defined. Perhaps he or she does not need to be. However, the reason the character is in the attic—or in the cabin at all, for that matter—is a little hazy. Setting: You've described the attic very well! I see it as a picture in a child's storybook. I read this story a while ago and stuck it in my review drafts folder. Reading it again today, I get the same image. To me, that states the setting was written very well, for it stick in the reader's mind so long and so consistently. The only issue I have is that it doesn't seem like a very comfortable place to sit and relax, being surrounded by spiderwebs and junk. First time reading it through, I thought the main character might even have been a ghost!  Story Arc:  The arc in this is fairly shallow, but it's there. One "problem" I find is that the character is serene throughout the whole story. Yet, "The day’s lingering restlessness melts away..." Each time I read this, I wonder to what "restlessness" this refers. But overall, sense of loneliness resolved by a gift from nature is clear and complete. Organization: The flow and sequencing work seamlessly. The reader is not bounced around from one location or point in time to another. However... Mechanics: ...your tense has some problems. Your story is written in present tense, except for paragraphs 3 through 7, which are written in past tense. You need to tighten that up and decide if this wonder nightfall already happened at a point in the past or if it's happening now. Beyond that, I see no issues with commas, periods, etc. This is possibly neither here nor there, and it doesn't impact my rating. I found it kind of funny; you might want to revisit it or not.. The MC asks the kitten what it's doing there. "The kitten didn't answer..." My goodness, if it had answered, this would have been a very different story!  Overall Score: This was a nice, peaceful read, relaxing for the reader and a good reminder that God and nature have already given us the gifts of peace; it is our job to accept them on our terms, let them embrace us with their warmth, and influence our days and nights for the better. Thanks for a refreshing, positive read. Now I can go find my cat and let her back up in my lap. This review offered by Jeffrey ——————————   "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"   Please note that my reviews are intended to be respectful and encouraging. If you feel I have been rude, cruel, or otherwise inappropriate, please report this review to a moderator.
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